"Without friends, problems weigh more and pleasures yield less joy," says Marla Paul, author of "The Friendship Crisis: Finding, Making, and Keeping Friends When You're Not a Kid Anymore." Fortunately, with social media sites such as Facebook and MySpace, connecting to people with common interests is much easier than it was before the Internet took community interaction to another level. However, if hanging out online isn't your thing, the old-fashioned way of finding friends is still viable.
Locating Potential Friends
Step 1
First decide the type of friend you want. Ask yourself what activity or hobby you would like to share with another person. An article in "Psychology Today" suggests that though friendship usually happens with frequent interaction, "the process is more complex" and involves discovering common interests and activities. Determine whether this friend should be male or female and whether you want just a companion during your activity or a deeper relationship.
Step 2
Join a social media network that allows you to find specific groups of interest and track which ones are in your local city. Search for online clubs and forums within your interest by using a search engine. Sign up to receive their newsletters to stay informed about upcoming events and classes in your area where potential friends gather. Choose three different groups or local social spots to check out.
Step 3
Look in your phone directory and call the businesses or organizations that are local. Ask if they have any up-coming events where you could meet people. Attend the ones that appeal to you the most.
Step 4
Introduce yourself to as many people as you can while attending group meetings, classes and social gatherings. Pay attention to how you feel with each person and continue conversations with those with whom you feel most comfortable. Exchange personal information, such as phone numbers, emails and other social media contacts. Set a time when you can meet for lunch or at another event within your common interest.
Step 5
Host a luncheon or party with your interest theme. Invite your current friends and your new ones so they can mingle. Ask each friend to bring someone they think would enjoy it. Talk to each person with intent to get to know them better and discover other areas of common interest.
Tips and Warnings
- If you are shy and find meeting new people difficult, try asking a close friend or family member to introduce you to their trusted friends at a gathering. If you are an expert in a field or particular craft or hobby, hold a class or talk at your local church or community center, where you can meet new people.
- When adding friends on a social media site, stick to friends of friends for your security. Never meet with someone you befriend on the Internet without first knowing them well. Always meet in a public location and take someone with you for the first time.
Things You'll Need
- Computer
- Phone
- Phone book/directory
- Transportation
- Food
- Party supplies
References
- "Finding, Making, and Keeping Friends When You're Not a Kid Anymore"; Marla Paul; 2004
- "Psychology Today": Friendship: The Law of Attraction
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