The word "bereave" comes from Old English roots meaning "to deprive," reports HealthyPlace.com, and regardless of the circumstances, death is a deprivation. Coping with the loss of someone you love is arguably the single most difficult challenge you will ever face, and you may experience a range of unpredictable emotions, such as shock, sadness, anger or guilt. There's no time line for grief and no "right" way to do it, says HelpGuide.org, but there are approaches that are healthier and more conducive to recovery.
Step 1
Express your feelings. HelpGuide.org reports that it's a common misconception among the grief-stricken that ignoring unpleasant or painful feelings will make them "go away." In actuality, refusing to face your feelings of sadness, anger, guilt or fear will only cause them to linger and delay healing. It may be difficult to face and express these emotions, but you need to do this in order to overcome your loss.
Step 2
Avoid or delay major life changes. According HealthyPlace.com, embarking on life-changing endeavors might seem like a way to "forget," but in actuality it might overwhelm you. It's important to recognize that the loss of your loved one is a major change in itself, one you'll need to take time to adapt to. Making other big changes, like moving, remarrying or having a child, could interfere with your ability to adapt and cause further emotional upset.
Step 3
Turn to friends and family. The support and empathy of people who understand your grief can be invaluable to you, reports HealthyPlace.com. Other family members or friends who have experienced loss can provide guidance and comfort. Another option is to join a support group for grieving people. Death and bereavement are universal human experiences, and spending time with others who are also grieving will give you a sense of connectedness in your sorrow.
Step 4
Draw upon faith or spirituality. If you have religious or spiritual beliefs, turn to them for comfort and meaning, says HelpGuide.org. Practice any spiritual rituals you may have, such as praying or meditating.
Step 5
Take care of yourself, physically and emotionally. It's important that you continue to eat and get plenty of rest, despite the disruption your grief may be causing, reports HealthyPlace.com. Consult with your doctor about any health problems you may be experiencing, and stay aware of your mental and emotional health as well. You may also benefit from therapy; seek out a counselor with experience in bereavement and loss.
Tips and Warnings
- Give yourself time. The amount of time it takes to recover from a loss varies widely, and there is no such thing as "normal" in this case, reports HelpGuide.org. Let yourself cry---or not cry. HelpGuide.org reports that many people mistakenly believe that not crying after a death means you "don't care." Although crying is one way of showing feelings, it is by no means the only way. Some people show their feelings differently.
