Managing oppositional defiant children can be a frustrating, stressful experience for parents. Children who have oppositional defiant disorder are openly hostile and uncooperative and resist the authority of parents, teachers and other adults. This behavior can be so disruptive that it interferes with the child's day-to-day functioning, according to the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry. Effectively parenting your child requires making changes to your normal parenting method and using stress relief techniques if the demands of parenting become overwhelming.
Step 1
Use positive reinforcement to encourage good behavior. Praise your child when he exhibits good behavior or is helpful or cooperative. Michigan State University suggests creating opportunities for positive reinforcement so that your child hears more positive than negative comments about his behavior during the day.
Step 2
Provide choices if possible. Ask your child if she would like to clean her room, finish her homework or take a walk first. The American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry recommends giving oppositional defiant disorder children a certain amount of control through choices that are acceptable to you.
Step 3
Develop a family routine. Post a schedule of your family's daily activities and remind your child of changes to the schedule in advance if possible to reduce his emotional outbursts.
Step 4
Ignore small rule infractions. If you punish your child for every infraction, no matter how insignificant, you will be in a constant power struggle with her. Michigan State University suggests deciding what behaviors you will ignore, which rules are negotiable and which rules must be reinforced.
Step 5
Model appropriate behavior and good communication skills when you must handle difficult situations. Children with oppositional defiant disorder can learn effective communication skills by watching their parents' behavior, according to Michigan State University.
Step 6
Spend time alone with your child. You may find that his behavior is better without outside distractions.
Step 7
Attend counseling sessions. Both individual and family therapy can help you and your child learn to handle bad behavior. Counseling also provides the opportunity for you to learn effective parenting skills for the oppositional defiant child.
Tips and Warnings
- Oppositional defiant disorder may not be the only problem your child has. Other disorders, such as mood disorders or attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, may be contributing to the problem. Treating other problems may help improve your child's behavior. Spending time away from your child can help you relax and reduce your stress level. The Federation of Families for Children's Mental Health suggests spending time alone with your partner and avoiding any discussions of your children while you are away from home.
Things You'll Need
- Activity schedule
