Becoming a father can be the most exciting time in a man's life, but some dads feel removed and frustrated rather than happy and fulfilled. To get the most out of fatherhood, you have to put effort in. Learn how to care for the needs of your new baby, and make sure to spend pleasurable time, too. By engaging your child early and often, you'll set the stage for a positive relationship over the years.
Stay at Hospital
If you're allowed, stay overnight with your significant other and your newborn at the hospital. MayoClinic.com says this offers you the chance to participate actively in the baby's first days. While you're at the hospital, ask a nurse or other staff member to show you how to perform basic tasks, such as changing a diaper and bathing a newborn. Some dads who don't get this experience feel like outsiders, especially when the mom is busy bonding with the baby.
Spend Quality Time
You might be the primary caregiver, or you may work while your partner stays home. In either case, you'll have a full plate, but be sure to set aside quality time with your newborn. Sing or play games such as peekaboo, says Greg Bishop, founder of Boot Camp for New Dads, a program offered in hospitals around the country. Remember to make eye contact while you play, Bishop says.
Moms tend to cuddle babies tenderly, but dads play more actively, says Jenna McCarthy, author of four parenting books and a writer for NewParent.com. Your baby will benefit from both kinds of attention so don't feel you have to emulate your partner's approach. As a dad, feel free to tickle your baby's tummy or bicycle her legs while she's lying in her crib or on a mat.
Support Partner
Your wife or significant other is getting over the trials of childbirth and can use all the support she can get. If you're at work and she's home with the baby, take time to call her during the day, Bishop says. Be a good listener and let her know you appreciate her. If you're the caregiver and can get a free minute, call your partner at work to ask how it's going. Chances are she'll love an update on the baby.
Also, do some chores you don't usually do, McCarthy recommends. Fold the laundry when your partner isn't looking, or wash the dishes when it's her turn. And offer plenty of treats, such as an appointment for a spa treatment while you watch the baby.
Get Past Hard Times
Bringing a new baby home isn't only elating, but it's also exhausting and can be a source of worry. MayoClinic.com says it may change your lifestyle, add to financial concerns and put stress on your relationship with your partner. If you're depressed or having problems dealing with your situation, talk to a friend or relative. If you still feel you can't handle the new challenges, get help from a professional counselor.
