Goal Setting & Self-esteem

Self-esteem and goal achievement are mutually reinforcing. The higher your self-esteem, the better your ability is to achieve your goals. The more goals you achieve, the higher your self-esteem will be. A knowledge of human psychology can help you to begin an upward spiral of accomplishment and self-esteem as you achieve goal after goal.

Preliminary Considerations

Before you being setting and achieving goals, you should take some measures to raise your self-esteem. One way to do this is by changing your thinking using the principles of cognitive behavioral therapy, according to the Mayo Clinic. Learn to identify common irrational thinking patterns, such as filtering out positive aspects of situations and all-or-nothing thinking. Make a practice of noticing your own thoughts, identifying irrational thoughts, challenging them and replacing them with rational thoughts. This will take time and practice.

Challenge Level

Formulate goals that challenge you but are attainable, says Margaret Moore, co-director of the McLean/Harvard Medical School Institute of Coaching. If your self-esteem is fragile, you may lose heart if you fail to achieve a goal simply because it was too ambitious. Nevertheless, your goals should be challenging enough to leave at least a bit of doubt as to whether you can achieve them or not.

Process versus Outcome

Process goals are goals that focus on your own behavior, such as running three miles a day or refraining from consuming sugar and alcohol. Outcome goals are framed in terms of ultimate results, such as losing 15 pounds. Process goals are more effective than outcome goals, says the Mayo Clinic, because they give you more control over their achievement. Process goals will allow you to make and keep promises to yourself, thereby enhancing your self-esteem.

Positive Statements

Frame your goals positively, advises the Turner Leadership Academy at the University of Kentucky. Instead of resolving to overcome your fear of public speaking, for example, you might resolve to join the local Toastmasters Club and speak for at least five minutes twice a month. Instead of quitting smoking, you might resolve to run a mini-marathon within a certain finishing time, knowing that you will have to quit smoking in order to finish the marathon.

The "Win-Learn" Mentality

Substitute a win-lose mentality with a win-learn mentality, advises Moore. Make a point of seeking lessons to learn from all experiences, regardless of whether they represent successes or setbacks. Once you have identified your lessons, decide how you can use them to prevent future setbacks or magnify future victories. When you reach the point where you can harness even your setbacks for your long-term gain, you will no longer suffer any real defeats.