How To Meet People & Find Friends

Your friends may have moved to other cities, and you would like to meet people living closer to you. You may be a loner who wants to learn better skills for meeting people and making new friends. You may have finished college or left a job, and lost touch with the people you met there. Fortunately, there are many ways to meet new people and build friendships with them.

Step 1

Study every book and website you can find that discusses how to meet people and make new friends. A good place to start is a free online book offered by the U.S. National Mental Health Information Center, "Making and Keeping Friends: A Self-Help Guide."

Step 2

Take the "Friendship Scale" quiz offered as a free download by the University of Melbourne's Center for Participant Reported Outcomes. The quiz will reveal if your friendship skills could use some improvement. Another test that may be helpful is the "Communications Skills Test" on the "Psychology Today" website.

Step 3

Visit a therapist if your scores on the "Friendship Quiz" or the "Communications Skills Test" were low. You may be suffering from a psychological or medical condition, such as depression or Asperger's syndrome, which hampers your ability to connect with people. Therapy and medication can help you find creative workarounds for your personality quirks.

Step 4

Contact online and in-person groups that share your special interests or hobbies. Whether you are an enthusiastic breeder of miniature "teacup" chihuahuas or a devoted follower of the Dalai Lama, there are hundreds of people who share your interests and could become new friends.

Step 5

Participate in online networks such as Facebook, MySpace, LinkedIn and Twitter. Social media expert Jay Baer has created visual graphs showing that prior to the development of online social networking, people might meet in person at social functions, communicate via email, meet in person for drinks and then become close friends. Baer theorizes that the development of social networking means that people now meet online first via Twitter or LinkedIn, become Facebook friends, exchange emails and then meet in person.

Step 6

Seek out support groups for people who share your problems. If you provided parenting for your siblings because your alcoholic parents ignored them, or your current friends do not understand your long struggle with bipolar disorder, consider joining support groups of your peers, who can offer you friendship, understanding and new ideas for recovery. One source for support groups is the Healthfinder.gov "Support Groups" page.

Step 7

Drop toxic friends. The time and energy you expend on friends who treat you badly, are chronically in trouble with the law or cannot get through one day without drama could be better spent on meeting positive new friends. Also, if you are seen with toxic friends a lot, it may discourage emotionally healthier people from befriending you. Sociologist Jan Yager's 2002 book, "When Friendship Hurts," provides clear guidelines to help you determine if a friendship has become toxic.