The barrage of media images depicting seniors as incompetent, helpless fools may serve to get a laugh or sell products but they are not real and can do real harm to seniors who see themselves as the media images. There is no reason why a healthy man who has had an active and productive life should give up all his interests and passions because he's retired and less sexually active. This is a time for new growth and expansion, if you maintain a positive outlook and take steps to stay healthy.
Grumpy Old Man Stereotype
Jack Lemmon and Walter Matthau, in "Grumpy Old Men," played a pair of irascible older men who struggle with their senior identities and roles in life. Through common sense and good humor---plus the attentions of a gorgeous younger woman played by Ann-Margret--- they survive their encounters with the male climacteric, or male menopause.
For other men, this time of life is rough---with or without Ann-Margret. Changing hormones, diminished vigor and mental acuity associated with male menopause are enough to put any guy in a bad mood. Sometimes those grouchy moods affect men's relationships with those nearest and dearest, particularly their wives or partners.
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Is It Really Testosterone?
Common stereotypes of the dithering senior failing in mind and body are overblown in our youth-obsessed culture. While male menopause is real, only 25 percent of men 30 and older actually have low testosterone levels, according to Health.com. Some of the signs of climacteric---fatigue, depression, weight gain---could also relate to general health and diet.
The clamor for testosterone replacement treatment because of naturally declining levels of the male hormone has shown mixed results, according to David Zahaluk, MD, a family medicine physician at Baylor Medical Center in Texas.
Of the approximately 5 percent of men who undergo testosterone replacement therapy, a significant number do not have flagging testosterone levels but some other health issues, Zahaluk says. In addition, there is an increased risk of heart disease, stroke and possibly prostate cancer in men treated with testosterone.
Menopausal Role Reversal
For couples, this period of life may present unexpected challenges. Because of the decline in both male and female sex hormones, women tend to become a bit more masculine and assertive while men become softer and gentler in their emotions. This gender role reversal can be unsettling.
But many men---and their partners---gracefully accept the changes that come with age and seem hardly affected by male or female menopause. Men who have defined themselves by their work and given little thought to aging and retirement are more likely to be traumatized by the transition.
What Can a Man Do?
If you find the transition into male menopause troubling, talk it over with your partner, doctor and male friends. Sharing feelings helps to manage them. Ignore the many negative stereotypes in the media about aging; look for positive examples of how seniors have not only endured but prevailed over climacteric.
Be aware of your own health status: eat the right kinds of healthy foods; get plenty of sleep. Swimming, running, bicycling and weight lifting are all good forms of exercise. If your sex life changes, accept it just as you accept other adjustments. Try to expand your spiritual life.
It's an Opportunity, Not a Crisis
The energy and years of hard work you've devoted to your career and family are now in a new focus. Your children most likely have left home and you don't need to go to the office every day. You've graduated to a new level of life where you can devote some of your time and energy to causes, hobbies, travel. Keeping yourself engaged in life will keep you alert and help relieve depression.
