Moodiness in teenagers, while normal, can also signal deeper troubles, according to Susan Pazarine, Ph.D., author of "A Parent's Guide to the Teen Years." Paying attention to your teenager and developing coping strategies for dealing with his mood swings can help both of you survive this fragile, sometimes volatile stage of development.
Time Frame
According to KidsHealth, adolescence starts at different ages. It all depends on your individual child's rate of development. A sign of the beginning of adolescence is the child's desire to distance herself from parents. Additionally, you will notice your budding adolescent trying to fit in with peers. Her awareness of how peers view her becomes pronounced and is often a source of anxiety.
Causes of Moodiness
According to Panzarine, the changes in hormones are part of the reason for a teenager's moodiness. The flood of hormones combined with a heightened sensitivity as adolescence begins is a formula for unexpected mood changes. Your teen's feelings are often strong, washing over her and causing confusion for the both of you. She is trying to manage her social life and her appearance, while at the same time trying to gain independence from her parents.
Teen's Coping Strategies
KidsHealth suggests some coping methods for teenagers to deal with their sometimes overwhelming moods and emotions. Your teenager can talk to someone he trusts, get a full night's rest, engage in exercise, which has positive effects on mood, do something creative, like writing or painting, or simply wait out the mood, while acknowledging that past bad moods have always gone away and this one will, too.
Considerations
There are methods for you, the parent, in dealing with your teen when he is moody. Panzarine suggests the most important thing is remembering that the moodiness is not personal, and avoid overreacting.
According to KidsHealth, let your teen know that this moodiness is normal. Sometimes knowing nothing is wrong with their experience is soothing for them. Panzarine points out how overwhelming all of the changes are for kids going through adolescence, and they may feel they are the only ones experiencing the storm of emotion. Point out that their peers are likely experiencing similar feelings. Letting your teen know that the flood of hormones is partly to blame can help give him the sense that it isn't all in his head, but related to real physical changes.
KidsHealth recommends parents pick their battles, stick to their rules and enforce consequences, and maintain open communication early on about topics like drugs, sex and peers.
Warning
Moodiness, while very common for teens, could also be a warning sign of depression or other problems. If you notice that your teenager has a major change in weight, personality, friends, and grades, or if she has problems with the law, talks about suicide, or could possibly be using substances, it's time to seek professional help.
Panzarine points out that feelings like sadness come and go, but if your teen feels sad or down for more days than not over a two-week period, or if she feels too overwhelmed with her feelings, talk to your child's doctor, a counselor or psychologist.
Teens are at risk for depression, and leaving it untreated can at best, damage social networks and leave them in unnecessary pain, and at worst, put them at risk for suicide, according to Panzarine.
References
- KidsHealth: Why Am I in Such a Bad Mood?
- KidHealth: A Parent's Guide to Surviving the Teen Years
- "A Parent's Guide to the Teen Years"; Susan Panzarine; 2000
