Dealing with the anniversary of the death of your loved one can provoke powerful emotional and physical reactions. You may find yourself reminiscing more frequently or thinking about the events that led up to the death. According to the Mayo Clinic, you may even experience physical symptoms, such as sleeping problems, upset stomach or headaches. The first anniversary can be the hardest, although subsequent anniversaries can also trigger intense emotional reactions as well. Everyone handles grief reactions differently. You have to do what is comforting and soothing for you.
Step 1
Let yourself cry or get angry. Don't try to push your feelings down. Allow whatever comes up to come to the surface. This is different for everyone, so don't compare yourself to others you know who have gone through a similar experience. According to MayoClinic.com, these emotional reactions can last for days or weeks surrounding the anniversary.
Step 2
Talk to others about your feelings. Let family members and trusted friends know when the anniversary is. If you'd like them to be with you on that day, ask them to be present. According to Helpguide, a nonprofit mental health and well-being website, you should try to connect with others, not avoid them. Find someone you trust to talk to about the loss. Social support can lessen your feelings of isolation and loneliness.
Step 3
Reminisce about your loved one. Look through photo albums, listen to songs that you shared together or watch home videos. Plant a tree in her name on the anniversary of her death. You may wish to gather family members and friends together to have a memorial service. According to California Home Care and Hospice, having a memorial ritual can provide comfort and help to keep the memory of your loved one alive.
Step 4
Write a letter to your loved one to express your feelings. Share your feelings of loss and grief. You may also wish to share the year's events or accomplishments. Writing a letter can be a comforting and helpful way of sharing and expressing your feelings about the anniversary.
Step 5
Talk to a therapist. The idea of the anniversary of your loved one's death may interfere with your daily activities and well-being for an extended period of time. In this case, it can be helpful to talk to a professional grief counselor, according to Helpguide. You can ask your doctor or health insurance company for a referral to a counselor in your area.
