If your wife suddenly decides to start smoking, you have every reason to feel concerned--or maybe even angry. After all, most adults know that smoking is a potentially dangerous habit that can seriously impact a person's health and longevity. Still, in spite of the widely publicized dangers, one in three adults smoke cigarettes on a daily basis, according to Smokingstatistics.org.
While you cannot force someone to quit smoking, there are things you can do to help your wife put down the cigarette and see the light.
Step 1
Tell your wife how her smoking impacts you relationship with her. If you don't like the smell of smoke on her clothes or you worry every time you hear her cough, let her know. Express your concerns in a way that makes her feel valued and loved, while keeping the focus on your feelings. Although only your wife can make the decision to quit, she might conclude that a happy marriage is more important than smoking cigarettes.
Step 2
Find ways to distract your wife from smoking, advises the American Cancer Society. Suggest dinners, movies, hikes and other activities where you can spend smoke-free time together.
Step 3
Offer to make a healthy change in your own life in exchange for her quitting smoking. For instance, tell her you will drop 10 pounds, start a new exercise regimen or give up your morning coffee if she quits.
Step 4
Ask why your wife started smoking. If she started smoking to lose or maintain her weight, reassure her that you love her no matter how much she weighs. If she started because she feels anxious in social situations, talk to her about other ways to cope with anxiety.
Step 5
Give your wife an incentive to quit. Offer to buy her something she wants or take her on a weekend getaway if she agrees to stop smoking.
Step 6
Persist in your efforts to get your wife to quit. If you don't succeed with your first attempt, try again later. She might start to experience some of the negative health effects of smoking and feel more open to quitting.
Tips and Warnings
- While your wife might eventually benefit from seeing a therapist or smoking cessation expert, don't bother making an appointment on her behalf. According to Caring.com, most therapists will not see a smoker who has not made the decision to quit.
- Avoid making disparaging remarks or using guilt to get your wife to quit smoking. If you make her feel bad, she might turn to cigarettes to lift her mood.
References
- Caring: How to Get Someone to Quit Smoking Without Hating You
- American Cancer Society: Helping a Smoker Quit: Do's and Dont's: General Hints for Friends and Family
- Bucknell University: How to Help a Friend Quit Smoking
- Quit Tobacco: How to Help Someone Quit
- Smoking Statistics: Smoking Statistics Over Last Decade (1999-2009)
