Your child's behavior might be deemed bad if it doesn't match your family's expectations, if it is disruptive and if it isn't appropriate based on your child's level of development, according to the American Academy of Family Physicians. All children exhibit bad behavior from time to time because they are designed to test their limits, but parents are responsible for deciding what behaviors are appropriate and finding ways to oust behaviors that aren't.
Common Causes
According to the University of Missouri Extension, children commonly behave poorly to get attention, to test whether you mean what you say, because they're imitating others' behaviors, because they are trying to become independent from you, because they feel afraid or threatened, because they feel bad about themselves or because they are sick, hungry or tired.
Addressing Behavior Problems
Have realistic expectations about your child's behavior before you determine how you will respond to it. A 2-year-old child, for example, can't usually sit still quietly for a long period of time. Some of your child's behaviors may simply be annoying, rather than harmful. The best way to stop these behaviors is to ignore them, according to the American Academy of Family Physicians. Focus your attention on the top one or two dangerous or bothersome behaviors and state a few clear rules about them, says the University of Michigan Health System. Use natural consequences such as taking a toy away if the child uses it to hit her brother, or taking the car away if your teen gets a speeding ticket, to encourage your child to make the right choice in the future.
Preventing Bad Behavior
Give your child a chance to make developmentally-appropriate decisions. You will avoid some headaches if, for example, you give your preschooler a choice between cereal and a waffle for breakfast or the car book or the train book before bedtime. As your child gets older, ask him at a calm time to help you set some household rules, suggests the University of Michigan Health System. Another way to prevent bad behavior is to develop daily rituals so your child knows what to expect; give him a 10-minute warning, for example, before it's time to come inside for dinner.
Risks of Spanking
Spanking or using other forms of physical punishment may quickly stop behavior problems in the moment, but it doesn't work in the long-term, says the American Academy of Family Physicians. Spanking can instill fear in a child and it doesn't teach your child what behavior she should use instead of the bad one she chose. In time, it may also encourage her to behave more aggressively, according to the American Academy of Family Physicians.
Warning Signs
Children who exhibit hostile, disruptive or aggressive behaviors for at least six months are classified as having behavior disorders, according to the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration. Warning signs that your child has a behavior disorder include: harm to himself or others, damaging property, stealing or lying, poor school performance, ditching school, early sexual activity, early smoking or drinking, drug use, frequent arguments and tantrums and hostility towards authority figures, says the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration.
References
- MedlinePlus (Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration): Child Behavior Disorders
- University of Missouri Extension: Seven Reasons Children Misbehave
- American Academy of Family Physicians: What Parents Can Do to Change Their Child's Behavior
- University of Michigan Health System: Behavior Problems -- Your Child
- University of Missouri Extension: Discipline -- When Kids Misbehave
