Teens and The Internet: How Scared Should Adults Be?

Overview

At times, young people put more information than they should on the Internet. Some get caught in scandals posting less-than-savory pictures or information and pay the price in school, home or with potential employers or schools. While it may be true that youth are hooked into their social networking sites with incredible focus (sometimes to the detriment of social relationships or homework), it pays to examine some of the balancing news.

Afraid or Informed

The media often reports on the harmful effects of the Internet. Rarely do you see headlines about how young people use the web to help themselves or to help others. As a result, more adults are concerned about their teens' use of online time. While it is important to stay up to date on what your teen is doing, it is equally necessary to take an objective look at what is behind the stories in the news.

The Research

Take the Symantec/Online Norton study of the top 100 websites accessed by young people. Sex and porn ended up on that list, but they were not numbers one or two; instead they were four and six. Search engines and entertainment websites were more prevalent, as were searches for celebrities and fictional characters appealing to children. What seems most surprising about the compiled list of searches is how much they mirrored what adults are looking for on the web.

Do As I Say

What that brings to mind is the old adage "Do as I say, not as I do." So much of what adults do, young people will do as well. Violence in children can often be traced to the family of origin and the roots of violent behavior there. Often, the beginnings of teen substance use are found to stem from issues within the family.

Besides familial role modeling, many of us live in cultures in which media equates success with sex, alcohol, beauty and fashion products. There just are not many advertisements for perfume-using models who appear to be studying hard or excelling at their jobs. It seems counter-intuitive to expect young people to make positive choices about school or sex or health when adults everywhere themselves are modeling unhealthy choices.

Role Model

Take it upon yourself to model good choices and likely your offspring will follow. Maybe it helps to keep in mind that Internet scandals have not been limited to young people. More than one adult has gotten in trouble with children's schools, neighbors and the law posing as their children's friends on the Internet or posting their own "hate" lists. When the fear about youth on the web spirals out of control, knowing that we all have to find a useful way to use the Internet might be a helpful tactic to weather the storm.

Talk About It

Next time you find yourself creeping to find out about sex on the Internet, think about having a conversation with your child about what might be found and how they might best use the information. Because if you have found it, likely they have too. And time and time again, research has shown that one of the best paths to better choices for young people is through communication and information provided by their parents.