Occasionally, everyone experiences a jolt to their self-confidence and self-esteem. The loss of a job, the end of relationship or even a fortunate event such as a promotion can cause people to doubt their self-worth. If your mother is grappling with such issues, approach her with love and compassion, and let her know you'd like to help her build her confidence and feelings of self-worth. Be gentle and patient as she works with you to be the woman you know she can be.
Step 1
Ask your mother to list her strengths and talents or write a thank-you letter to herself that details her unique qualities. When people appreciate their own positive qualities, they learn to love themselves. They feel worthy of receiving love from others and can build healthy relationships, says M.J. Ryan, author of "Attitudes of Gratitude."
Step 2
Help your mother eliminate negative or self-critical thinking. Often, even more than actual circumstances, a person's thoughts determine whether she feels worthy or capable. If your mother tends to make broad statements, such as "I'm not good at anything" or "I can't get my act together," remind her of her strengths and abilities and let her know she's capable of anything she takes on.
Step 3
Express appreciation to your mother for the things she does for you and for being in your life. Showing appreciation can be as simple as listening attentively and honestly, saying "thank you" or giving her praise and encouragement.
Step 4
Role-play with your mother to build her assertiveness. In general, women who are assertive are confident, both while they are asserting their wants and needs and afterward, according to Lynn Z. Bloom, Karen Coburn and Joan Crystal Pearlman, authors of "The New Assertive Woman." Give your mother several situations in which she would need to voice her opinion or wants--such as asking for a raise or telling someone they've done something hurtful--and ask her to offer assertive responses.
Step 5
Take a class with your mother to broaden her horizons and improve her self-esteem. You'll not only help build your mother's confidence but also spend quality time with her and learn something new.
Step 6
Encourage your mother to steer clear of negative individuals and spend time with people who wish only the best for her. When people connect with individuals who encourage and support them, the more they avoid people who are self-centered, overly critical or pessimistic, says Psychology Today contributor Mark Goulston. Help your mother identify the people who are on her side and encourage her to develop close relationships with them.
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