Having some frustration, anger and aggression is normal for both children and adults. Using small amounts of these feelings in a positive way can help a person accomplish goals, according to the University of Michigan Health System. However, some children develop aggressive behavior that may indicate an underlying emotional problem. Know what to look for in your child.
Causes
A child's anger is an emotion that occurs in reaction to feelings such as fear, sadness, disappointment, frustration and jealousy, according to the Child and Family Development Center at the University of Utah. These feelings may occur when an event or circumstance causes him to feel low self-esteem, a sense of isolation or a loss of control. Some children have trouble coping with these feelings and don't have the ability to monitor their actions, so their feelings escalate until anger manifests as aggressive behavior, according to the North Carolina Cooperative Extension Service.
Contributing Factors
External factors such as stress in the family, a community without healthy recreation alternatives, crowding in schools, extreme heat, and violence on television and in the community can contribute to aggression in children, according to the North Carolina Cooperative Extension Service. However, a child's innate temperament and her coping skills are on the top of the list of factors that contribute to aggression. About 15 percent of children are grouped into the "feisty or difficult" temperament category, and aggressive behavior is a normal occurrence with them, says the North Carolina Cooperative Extension Service.
Responding to Aggression
The way you respond to your child's aggression should depend on his level of development. For example, most toddlers respond best when they are removed from the cause of the problem behavior and redirected to a safer or more calming activity, according to the University of Michigan Health System. Older children, on the other hand, generally have the capacity to understand and remember rules. Focus your attention on one or two of your child's most dangerous behaviors rather than trying to get him to change everything at once. Make a few clearly stated rules and explain what will happen if your child doesn't follow them. Then immediately and consistently implement the consequences when your child acts aggressive. Logical consequences, such as confiscating his toy if he has used it to hit another child, are usually the most effective, says the University of Michigan Health System.
Prevention
Mentally jot down events and circumstances that cause your child to act aggressive, and avoid some of the unnecessary ones. For example, put away your child's favorite toys when you know she won't want to share them with her play date. Also, find opportunities to praise your child. Catch her being good and use specific phrases to let her know what she did right, suggests the University of Michigan Health System. For example, rather than saying, "You're playing so nicely!" say, "I love how you were so polite when you shared your crayons." She will want to behave well if she knows what behaviors evoke a positive reaction.
Signs of Abnormal Aggression
Talk to your pediatrician if your child seems to act unusually aggressive for longer than a few weeks or if you're having trouble coping with his behavior, says the American Academy of Pediatrics. Your child might have a behavioral disorder if he's injuring himself or others, if he attacks you or other adults, if he has frequent outbursts, if he's being sent home or being prevented from playing by school or neighbors, or if you're afraid for others' safety when he's around them.
References
- University of Utah: Anger and Aggression in Young Children
- North Carolina Cooperative Extension Service: Childhood Aggression
- University of Michigan Health System: Behavior Problems
- The American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry: Understanding Violent Behavior in Children and Adolescents
- American Academy of Pediatrics: Aggressive Behavior
