Making a happy life has been a research topic of positive psychology for years. This branch of psychology was developed by Martin Seligman and has been championed by many notable researchers such as Sonja Lyubomirsky of the University of California, psychologists like Martin Bolt, and authors such as Rick Warren. With solid research results, we are getting a clearer picture of how we can make our lives happier. These happiness authorities generally agree that several personal characteristics, behaviors and ways of thinking can help us all create happiness in our lives.
Step 1
Don't mistake money for happiness. Regardless of our level of wealth, it becomes our baseline--not an element which brings happiness. Research shows that people's perspective on their lives correlates more with happiness than wealth does.
Step 2
Compare wisely. When comparing yourself to another person's level of success, avoid choosing those who have achieved far beyond you. Choose people with similar circumstances. View highly successful people as examples from whom you can learn.
Step 3
Regularly practice gratitude. Immerse yourself in events which make you feel grateful. Develop a habit of identifying and expressing gratitude when someone gives to you. Everyday write down or mentally review at least five things for which you are grateful.
Step 4
Learn to flow. "Flow" is the term used by many positive psychologist to label the experience of becoming focused and immersed in what we are doing. Commit yourself to the activities you are engaged in and notice how you feel.
Step 5
Strive for excellence. Measure excellence in terms of your current capabilities and your realistic potential to improve. Avoid measuring excellence in terms of unrealistic perfection.
Step 6
Develop a hobby. Actively seek ways to enjoy yourself in a way which combines physical and mental activity. Avoid spending free time in passive activities which do not demand some measure of effort in both areas.
Step 7
Connect with others. Seek to establish close lasting bonds with family and friends. Actively invest your time, energy and emotions in these relationships to cultivate closeness.
Step 8
Develop acquaintances with those around you. Not everyone you come in contact with on a regular basis can become your close friend, but strive for a friendly acquaintance with those you see on a regular basis--for example your co-workers, neighbors and distant relatives.
Step 9
Volunteer. Give time and energy to others while distracting yourself from your own challenges. Accept the gratitude you receive, and enjoy the sense of satisfaction you get from helping.
Step 10
Find higher meaning. Regardless of how one manifests this in life (with or without religion or spirituality; alone or in groups) people who experience a sense of higher meaning in their lives are usually happier.
Tips and Warnings
- •Do some research and reading on the field of positive psychology. •Don't impose these changes on yourself-they would just become a new obligation. Instead, seek to integrate them into your current lifestyle. •Seek support in your efforts. •Keep a journal of progress.
References
- Martin Seligman; Authentic Happiness; 2002
- Martin Bolt; Pursuing Human Strengths: A Positive Psychology Guide; 2004
- C.R. Snyder and Dr. Shane Lopez; Positive Psychology: The Science of Happiness and Human Strengths; 2006.
