According to sources at Mental Health America, the loss of a loved one is an extremely difficult experience for any child. When a child experiences the loss of a parent due to war, he may experience a unique sense of trauma and loss due to the violent nature of the parent's death. Parents and adults who have frequent contact with a child who is suffering this type of loss can offer support by being well informed about the child's special needs.
Responses to Loss
Sources at Mental Health America note that children who suffer a loss due to war often experience a heightened sense of fear and insecurity. This trauma may result in shock, anger, irritability, inability to sleep, nightmares and even physical discomforts, such as stomachaches or headaches. Children may experience marked difficultly concentrating in school and academic performance will often drop. They may also have strong emotional reactions, such as withdrawing from friends or anxiety attacks or thoughts of suicide.
Considerations
According to Mental Health America, children who experience a loss due to war may need extra support from adults in expressing their complicated feelings of loss and anger. Children often need to express feelings in a physical manner, through crying or even through play that dramatizes the loss. Adults should allow children to express fears about death and the future, as children may have a concern that more loss will occur. Offering ongoing reassurance is critical to the recovery process.
Time Frame
According to sources at Mental Health America, children can be quite repetitive in the grieving process. There is no fixed time period for the recovery from a loss, and a loss from war may be repeatedly revisited if a child sees news reports, movies or television programs about war. Important times such as holidays, birthdays and the anniversary of the loss might trigger sadness and anxiety.
Additional Support
Experts at UNICEF note that many children who experience loss due to war can benefit from specialized grief work. Counseling may often include opportunities for art and play therapy that allow the child to express difficult feelings regarding violence. In addition, children may wish to attend group counseling that specifically focuses on loss due to war, and groups can give children a sense of community and peer support.
Expert Insight
Experts at Mental Health America note that adults supporting children with a loss due to war should be patient and not push the child to communicate his feelings. Additionally, adults should discuss the loss in concrete terms that provide honest facts about death, without overloading the child with upsetting information. Children who have suffered this nature of trauma will need ongoing reassurance and care from parents, teachers and community support providers in order to effectively process the event.
References
- Mental Health America: Helping Children Cope With Loss Resulting From War or Terrorism
- American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry: Children and Grief
- UNICEF: Helping Children Cope with the Stresses of War
- National Association of School Psychologists: Helping Children Cope with Loss, Death, and Grief
