Defiant children are those who refuse parental or other authority figures requests on a frequent basis, according to the Mayo Clinic. The child may be disruptive to others and seem negative. While these traits can be difficult to cope with as a parent, they can be a symptom of an underlying condition, such as attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder, anxiety or depression. Parenting solutions can improve your child's behavior.
Praise Good Behaviors
Parents of defiant children may frequently feel they are admonishing their child's bad behavior. While it is important to correct incorrect behavior and enforce rules, you also should look for opportunities to praise your child for modeling good behavior, according to the Mayo Clinic. Specifically recognize the positive actions your child has performed. One example could be "I appreciate how patient you were with your sister at the dinner table tonight." Reinforcing good behavior can encourage your child to continue these behavior patterns.
Consistently Enforce Rules
Routine is important for defiant children. An understanding of expectations helps your child to know what type of consequences she will experience if she breaks rules, according to the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry. You should set limits for your child that are age-appropriate. If your child breaks these limits, enforce the rules you have established. This does not mean, however, that you should structure every aspect of your child's life, according to ADDitude magazine. Offering reasonable flexibility can be helpful at times.
Spend Unstructured Time Together
Defiance can be the result of stress in your child. Spending time doing an enjoyable activity together can reduce stress and be a positive influence in your child's life, according to ADDitude magazine. Allow your child to select a favorite activity, and perform it together for 15 minutes each day. This helps your child to see you as a caring parent---not as a parent who is frustrated or upset with him.
Take Time for Yourself
Parents of defiant children can easily become frustrated, weary or angry at their child, according to Family Education. Because your defiant child needs a nurturing, caring parent, these feelings can reduce your parenting effectiveness. For this reason, you should always take some time for yourself each day. Whether taking a nap, reading a favorite book or listening to music, these activities allow you to recapture a calm spirit and help you to better cope with your defiant child.
