Parenting is a learn-as-you-go experience. Just when you think you have figured out the best way to respond to your child in one phase, she moves into another. There will be times you question your abilities and second-guess your decisions. Fortunately, many resources are available to help you improve your parenting skills.
Define Good Parenting
What words do you think of when you envision effective parenting? Before beginning any task, it is helpful to have an image in mind of your ultimate goal. For example, you might list traits such as patience, consistency, honesty and loyalty. Through defining the attributes that you see as comprising good parenting skills, you can begin to self monitor when interacting with your child. Later reflect on the attributes you demonstrated and the ones you would like to further develop.
Read
Visit your local bookstore or library. An abundance of information on improving parenting skills is available in books and magazines. Ask friends and relatives for recommendations.
Find a Mentor
Talk to other parents you consider "good parents." While every parent brings his own style to parenting, you can learn a lot by talking with other parents about what works for them. One place to start to is to ask your own parents, a sibling or a good friend for helpful ideas when you encounter a challenging behavior in your child. You may learn new solutions you had not have considered, gain reassurance when you are on the right track and find comfort in the fact that others have dealt with similar problems.
Join a Parent Group
Mommy and Me classes, church toddler groups and play groups are all great ways to meet other parents and gain information about parenting skills. Some groups have guest speakers, including child psychologists or speech therapists, who talk about areas of child development and what you can do to foster skills in your child.
Talk to Your Spouse
Discuss with your partner how you are going to handle situations before they arise. Parents are more effective and successful when they come to some agreements on expectations, discipline and family rules. According to Dr. Michael H. Popkin, "While parents do not have to be identical in either parenting style or perception of where to draw the limits, they should agree to discuss matters between themselves and come to an agreement about what to tell the child. This may require compromise between the adults, before even beginning to involve the child."
Educate Yourself
Take a class. You will find child development courses at almost every community college. Some school districts and community centers also offer classes on parenting skills.
