Approximately 40 million Americans are separated or divorced, according to the website Savvy Mommy. Many of them have children. The website Parenthood reports that according to the U.S. Census Bureau, more than one in four children live with only one parent. If you are one of those parents, you have a lot of company, and you have numerous ways to successfully navigate single parenthood.
Create a Safety Net
Sheila Ellison, author of "The Courage to Be a Single Mother," says it is important for you to have a support network and know that others have your back. Your safety net can include friends and family. The Parenthood website adds that another parent who has been single for awhile will be able to help you rationalize mountains back down to the size of molehills. A whole team of other single parents is even better. You can swap babysitting duties and stand in for each other when you can't be in two places at one time.
Be Realistic
Ellison cautions against trying to be Super Mom or Super Dad. The world won't end if you feed your kids fast food one night, as long as they eat healthfully most of the time. Your house doesn't have to be immaculate every second of every day. You likely won't be able to accomplish all the items on your daily to-do list, so prioritize. Figure out what's most important, start with that, then work your way downward. If you don't get to the last item on your list, the world probably won't end.
Expect the Unexpected
Plans will inevitably go awry, Parenthood says. If you're prepared, it won't derail you. Plan on all your children coming down with the flu at the same time. If it happens, you'll already have figured out how your boss is going to feel about you taking time off to take them to the doctor. You'll either have made arrangements to do it yourself, or you'll have someone from your safety net lined up to help out. Either way, expecting the unexpected will significantly reduce your stress level.
Think of Yourself Too
Savvy Mommy warns against always putting your children and your responsibilities to them first. You need occasional time to yourself to stay sane and healthy. When you reach out to your support network for help, it doesn't always have to be because of a problem or an emergency. Send the children to visit one of them for a few hours if you're exhausted and need a nap. In the article "6 Strategies for Single Mom Success" in "Parents" magazine, Laura Broadwell says that you'll be a better parent if you take care of yourself as well as your children. Looking our for yourself might include time for rest or fun, or even an appointment to see a therapist if you feel you need to talk out any difficulties you're having adjusting to being a parent on your own.
