How to Stop Reminiscing

Overview

Reminiscing is the act of recalling an event or time, usually positive, that occurred in your life. It may bring you joy to bring back the same feelings you once experienced in your childhood or early adulthood, but people who were not there to witness these events may feel left out of the conversation if you're reminiscing about a time they didn't experience with you. Learn to bring your past into your present, so you can share the wisdom you learned in the past with people you have current relationships with in the present.

Step 1

Know the difference between reminiscing and dwelling in the past. According to Robert Biswas-Diener, author of "Positive Psychology Coaching," occasional reminiscing can be a good thing as long as you are thinking about positive events. If you are constantly dredging up negative experiences and thoughts about your past, it can be detrimental to both your present and your future.

Step 2

Take a look at how often you think about the past vs. how much you talk or think about things going on in the present. Once you are aware of the balance, try to determine ways your life could be made better by shifting your thoughts to the present more often. Would you spend more time with friends? Would your conversations be more meaningful?

Step 3

Savor your thoughts of the past, then let them go. Biswas-Diener suggests taking a few minutes to remember every detail of a good past memory and let it truly encompass you. After thinking for a few minutes about how wonderful the time was for you, keep the good feelings in your body and let the event fall away. Bring these good feelings to your current experiences.

Step 4

Think positive thoughts about your present life. It's easy to slip into nostalgia if you're bored with your career or present lifestyle. Make a list of the things you do have--a warm bed to sleep in, a lovable dog, friends and family--to remember how many positive aspects exist in your present life. While you're appreciating your life in the present, you won't have time to think about your life in the past.

Step 5

Remember that reminiscing is not always a bad thing. According to Maria Krakovsky of Psychology Today, "naturally nostalgic people have high self-esteem and are less prone to depression." Don't beat yourself up if you find yourself drifting into the past every once in a while. Allow yourself to remember the good times, enjoy the feeling it gives you, then jump back into your life in the present.