Whether boys or girls are harder to raise is something hotly debated among parents. Of course, personal experience comes into play when forming opinions, but your actual parenting techniques could make a difference in the gender with which your child most identifies. While sex depends on your child's reproductive organs, gender is a cultural identity that contributes to your child's behavior and communication skills. Both nature and parenting techniques determine gender.
Significance
When you know how to properly parent your child's gender, you might become more confident in your parenting skills and interpreting your child's needs. Unfortunately, not all children fit into a gender mold. Some girls are tomboyish and prefer activities that are traditionally for boys, while some boys are more sensitive and empathetic than others. The trick is to allow your child to lead the way in his own growth and development in order to accommodate for his gender identity.
Nature vs. Nurture
The debate between nature and nurture continues in the child care and development community. Some believe that a child is born with certain traits and talents that are unchangeable, regardless of the situation. Others believe that care and upbringing are a bigger contribution to a child's personality. In the same way, some gender traits might be clear from birth and natural, while others are learned as a result of certain parenting techniques, according to PBS Parents.
Play Time
How you rear your child through play time could make a difference in her eventual gender identity. If you offer your child a wide array of activities and toys that aren't gender-specific, she'll create her own gender identity by choosing activities that she enjoys, whether it's a race track or a doll set. Children learn a great deal from play and will follow your lead by taking the toys that you offer and avoiding those that you discourage. By taking a neutral stance you allow your child to choose for herself, according to the website BetterParenting.
Communication Skills
The difference in communication skills between boys and girls is well documented. In his groundbreaking book, "The Essential Difference," Simon Baron-Cohen notes that a girl's brain is hard wired to be more empathetic, with more connections than a boys' brains. By contrast, a boy's brain is wired to note various outcomes and consequences. This knowledge is essential when planning effective discipline for your child.
Stereotypes
As a parent, it's especially important that you ignore gender stereotypes as your rear your child. Gender stereotyping can be detrimental to your child's future. For instance, if you support the stereotype that girls are less proficient in math and science, you might limit your child's abilities and talents by ignoring math and cultivating language skills instead. As a result, you could raise a child who is behind in school, according to the National Network for Child Care. The same could be said for pressing sports on a boy who would rather be in a drama class. Allow your child to pick and choose his various activities and interests, and follow his lead to develop a healthy, well-rounded child, no matter the gender.
References
- PBS Parents: The Effects of Nature
- BetterParenting: Raising Boys Vs. Girls
- "The Essential Difference: Male and Female Brains and the Truth About Autism": Simon Baron-Cohen; 2004
- National Network for Child Care: Mathi, Science and Girls: Can We Close the Gap?
