The ideal nuclear family isn't always the reality of a child's upbringing. There are millions of children in the United States that grow up with only one of their parents. Many times this is the mother, as women fare much better in child custody cases than men. In many ways, a single mother raising a son is the same as caring for a daughter, but there are added concerns with young boys.
Significance
There are steep challenges to raising children as a single mother. Living expenses can be crippling, particularly if the mother earns low wages and/or is forced to pay for child care. Child support can be difficult to enforce, and transportation to the boy's activities, whether sports, play dates or other appointments, can cause further strain.
Effects
The effects of a young boy growing up in a household featuring only a single mother can be most identifiable in the adolescent years. While younger children are not as socially aware, or even aware of their own gender, adolescent men begin trying to emulate the role of a man. Without a father at home to serve as an example, Linda S. Budd reports that young men turn to the media to determine how to compose themselves, often leading them toward macho male extremes, causing them to develop highly aggressive and testosterone-fueled patterns of behavior.
Role Models
To counter the risk of a boy using extreme media portrayals of men to formulate his identity, it is recommended that a single mother find stable, male role models for the child to develop a relationship with. Having these relationships enables the child to experience more realistic patterns of behavior, allowing him to mold himself after these men and embody some of their characteristics and traits. These men should be trustworthy and can be teachers, close friends, relatives or mentors, according to DivorceSource.com.
Resources
It is important to take advantage of the opportunities available to you in the community. Allowing your son to participate in sports and other group activities will take him off your hands for a bit and get him around other boys--and men, in the case of coaches--that can provide social relationships a mother cannot. You should try to involve your child with your extended family, creating a network of close relationships among both men and women to help guide your son.
Considerations
According to DivorceSource.com, the earlier you transition your son into a single-parent situation, the easier it will be for your child to accept that. Currently, three out of 10 boys live with a single mother. It is also important that a single mother be mindful of her own mental health, seeking out aid from loved ones as well as periods of relief to help keep herself stable and healthy.
