5 Things You Need to Know About Domestic Violence

1. Defining the Problem

Victims of domestic abuse include men, women and children of all nationalities. Most abuse victims don't consider themselves victims and most abusers don't think they fit the profile of an abuser. Anyone who endures verbal put-downs, verbal or physical intimidation, actual physical harm (hitting, slapping, kicking, pushing or forced sexual activity) or threats of violence by a partner or spouse is a victim of domestic abuse. Abusers may also attempt to isolate their victims from friends and family members to exert more control over them. Anyone who does these things to anyone else--even one time--is abusive.

2. The Smallest Victims

Children who are exposed to domestic violence are more likely to become abusers than children who grow up with no exposure to violent behavior in the home. Kids who live in abusive homes have a higher incidence of emotional and behavioral problems that range from rage, dread and gloom to low self-worth and negative interpersonal relationships. These children often do poorly in school and grow up to believe that males are superior in domestic partnerships.

3. Violence is Never Okay

No one does anything to deserve domestic abuse of any kind. The cause of domestic abuse always lies with the abuser. People who abuse others often use addiction as an excuse for their behavior, but drugs and alcohol are never the cause. Abusers make a conscious decision to do physical or emotional harm to their mates.

4. Be on the Lookout

Prospective partners shouldn't smother their mates by constantly wanting to spend time with them and only them. People should beware of quick romances where one partner immediately takes control of the relationship or of someone who tries to pressure a mate into something she doesn't want to do. No one should allow someone to forbid them to see friends or family members and normal amounts of attention from others shouldn't cause anyone jealousy.

5. Get Yourself Help

Victims of domestic abuse can find help through their Circuit Court by filing a personal protection order (PPO). This paper is designed to stop further abuse by preventing the abuser from entering the home or bothering their victim at work. The order can also prevent abusers from buying a gun. But it's just a piece of paper. Perhaps a better way to deal with a violent partner is to involve local police at the first sign of abuse. Taking the children along to a battered women's shelter and applying for custody of the children is another option. Remember that abuse never happens just once and the severity often worsens over time.