Much press is given to the danger of a new mother becoming depressed after the birth of a child, but it is much less frequent that you hear about new fathers dealing with depression. Although the birth of a baby can be a wonderful time in any parent's life, it also can be enormously stressful as well, and new fathers do not always escape without feeling depressed themselves. If you know of a new father who is struggling with depression, there are steps you can take to help him cope.
Step 1
Get him to recognize or admit his depression. Some new fathers may try to hide the fact that they are depressed. Instead of displaying feelings of sadness, you may see him exhibit anger, irritability or even violent behavior in an effort to suppress his depression, according to PostpartumMen.com. Getting him to admit that he does have a problem is the first step toward getting him help.
Step 2
Identify what may be triggering his depression. Financial concerns, incessant crying from the baby, sleep deprivation, a change in the relationship with the mother or concerns about being a good dad may be factors. By pinpointing the triggers, you may be able to work with him to figure out ways to alleviate those concerns or problems.
Step 3
Encourage him to seek help. This can be a bit tricky, as you do not want to come across and bossy or judgmental. However, depression can be a very serious matter and is best dealt with by seeking professional help. If he is reluctant to get help for himself, see if he would be willing to do it as a favor to his child or partner, as his depression will likely affect both of them negatively, according to research compiled by the Fatherhood Institute.
Step 4
Be helpful. Although this will not fix his depression, new parents are notoriously overwhelmed and sleep deprived, and any extra pair of hands is appreciated. Giving him time to get caught up on his sleep, run errands or babysitting for him may help him feel better.
Step 5
Be supportive. Even if he does seek professional treatment, having the support of family and friends can mean the world to someone who is depressed. He needs to know he is not alone and has others who support him.
Tips and Warnings
- Antidepressant medication may be useful in addition to therapy in fighting depression symptoms. The new father should talk to his doctor to determine if this option may be right for him.
- If the father ever demonstrates violent tendencies toward himself, the baby or anyone else, call 911 immediately. All suicidal thoughts should be reported to a mental health professional immediately.
