Grandparents are undoubtedly excited with the announcement of their first grandchildren. Even if the timing and circumstances sometimes are less than perfect, the arrival of the new addition can bring a family closer together, with the help of a steady hand from the grandparents. To help keep family bonds strong, help out respectfully and with care. Some grandparents may have differing expectations when it comes to their roles. Knowing what to expect can better prepare you for the impending arrival of your new grandchild.
Grandparent Roles
Some grandparents have differing opinions as to what their roles are as a grandparent. Some may want to be more involved, while others prefer to stay out of the way. Keep in mind that when a grandchild is born, the parents are the first line of care. Although they may ask for your help occasionally, it is best to see what you can do to help behind the scenes, while letting the new parents get used to having a baby in the house.
Advice
While you may be well-meaning and full of advice that you learned through years of parenting, don't be hurt or angry if your advice isn't well-received, or even ignored completely. New parents need time to figure some things out on their own, and your advice may be seen as a vote of non-confidence. Wait patiently, and one day you may find your advice being sought frequently. Then dispense it as necessary.
Privacy
The new parents may need privacy during the birth and first few weeks of their new life with your grandchild. Be respectful of their need for privacy. Ask if you can come visit, be in the delivery room or drop by, but don't become offended if the answer is no. Keep in mind that if they are asking for privacy from you, the grandparent, they are most likely asking it from everyone else as well. Instead of dropping by unannounced to visit, call ahead of time to gauge the situation.
Duties & Home Preparation
The addition of a new baby may change your life and routines almost as much as it does the new parents. You may be asked to help out in ways you didn't expect, such as washing dishes or cooking meals. You'll also need to prepare your home at some point; if you are the type of person who loves knick-knacks, you may find that you need to baby proof your home when your grandchild is old enough to become mobile. Relax and place all of your breakable items up high, so that you can enjoy your grandchild, instead of worrying over him.
Relationships
Expect to fall madly in love with your new grandchild. You are experiencing an extension of life through your child's child, and you should take as much time as possible to enjoy it. The addition of a grandchild can strengthen family relationships, as long as you are respectful toward the new parents, give them time and space, and offer a supporting arm when they need it. You'll find that a new baby brings you closer with your children, as they find out more about the sacrifice and love that you gave them when they were babies.
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