1. Connect Through Bonding
A maternal bond is the connection that a mother feels with her baby. This bond begins during pregnancy, often when the mother feels the first kicks from the baby or when she hears or sees the heartbeat during an exam or ultrasound. The maternal bond continues and strengthens after the baby is born. It continues all the way through the baby's life.
2. Encourage the Maternal Bond
Encouraging a strong maternal bond starts by interacting with a baby before it is born. Talking to your baby, massaging your stomach and focusing on the baby while you are pregnant helps you to start bonding before your baby arrives. After you give birth, you can continue to encourage a strong maternal bond by holding her as much as possible as soon as possible. Take the time to gaze into her eyes. Talk to her and sing to her. Involve your partner in the process when possible to encourage family bonding.
3. Bonding May Be Delayed
Maternal bonding isn't always immediate upon the birth of the baby. A mother may have trouble bonding with her baby if the baby requires immediate care in the neonatal intensive care unit. Some other causes of delayed bonding are difficult delivery, postpartum depression, excessive sleepiness or an "out of it" feeling because of medications given to the mother during labor and delivery and having a Cesarean section delivery. Sometimes, such as in cases of child abuse or neglect, a mother may fail to bond with her baby at all. Usually, this is because she resents the limitations that the baby has put on her life. Sometimes, it is because the mother was abused as a child or she is simply too immature to properly care for and bond with her baby.
4. Reap the Lifelong Effects of Bonding
When a mother forms a strong bond with her baby, the effects show up throughout the child's life. A child who has a strong bond with his mother will have more self-confidence. This usually leads to him doing better in school, forming more meaningful and life long friendships and getting into less trouble. An older child who has a strong bond with his mother is less likely to become addicted to drugs and alcohol. He is also less likely to participate in illegal activities.
5. Maternal Bond and the Court
Maternal bond is a term recognized by the legal system. Traditionally, courts saw a mother as the logical primary care giver for children if she could provide a decent life for the children. The courts are slowly starting to realize that in many cases, a father is the better choice to care for children. This is partially because the judges and advocates for the children have started to listen to what the children have to say.
