A common struggle for parents is how to approach disciplining a child. Newborns should not be disciplined because they are not able to understand how their actions lead to punishment, but toddlers on up need to be disciplined in some form to learn the consequences of bad behavior and the importance of following rules. Spanking is one option, but it easily can be overused and enter a gray area between discipline and abuse. Still, some psychologists suggest spanking can be done safely.
Differences of Opinion
There are several criticisms of spanking in any form. Some people consider any type of strike against a child to be abusive or at least have the potential to lead to abuse. Spanking is regarded as a violent approach to discipline that can be achieved through nonviolent approaches. The American Academy of Pediatrics reports that research shows children who are spanked are at a greater risk of becoming depressed, using alcohol, having anger problems, hitting their children or spouses and engaging in crime in contrast to people who have not been spanked. But proponents of spanking point out that spanking is a time-tested approach to discipline. Many proponents of spanking are people who were themselves spanked as children.
Risk of Abuse
A single spanking is not considered abuse as long as the strike is not excessively hard, but it is easy for physical discipline to become questionable in terms of legality. Spankings should provide a slight shock but not be overwhelmingly painful. They should not leave marks, nor should they be done out of anger towards the child. Spankings that occur when discipline is not appropriate, or when physical discipline does not fit the action of the child, also may be considered abusive.
Establishing Controls
If you are determined to spank your child, it is important to establish controls that keep you from getting out of hand and allowing a disciplinary act to turn abusive. Spanking should not be done when angry at the child. It should be a quick action that occurs once in direct response to an act or behavior by the child. Spankings should not feature repeated swats. Verbal correction should accompany the spanking so that the reason for discipline is understood. It should not occur in venues where the spanking may be embarrassing to the child.
Age Considerations
The effectiveness of spanking can change over time. Frequency should reduce over time, according Dr. John Rosemond, from up to once a week for toddlers to about once a month for older children. But by the time a child reaches 9 or 10 years of age, spanking becomes less effective and should be retired in exchange for other approaches to discipline, according to Rosemond.
