One of the main reasons young children struggle with anger management is because they often do not have the language to match their emotions. When a child experiences anger, fear, worry or sadness, he generally cannot easily identify his feelings and use language to express them. This can result in angry behavior that serves as the only way the child knows to communicate his feelings. Taking a cue from the psychological theories of art and play therapy, caregivers can help a child de-escalate during angry moments.
Use Art and Play to Help Children Identify Feelings
Step 1
Place a large piece of white construction-type paper in front of the child.
Allow him to choose from box of crayons and instruct him to draw or scribble the first things that come to mind. After the child is finished, walk through the creation with him, asking questions such as "Why did you choose this color?", "What is this person/thing/animal doing?" and "What are they thinking?"
Help the child explain emotions and provide appropriate vocabulary.
Step 2
Use play to help the child calm down.
Place dolls and sports games in front of the child and encourage her to choose the first item that seems interesting.
Engage with the child in play, allowing her to lead the way.
Pay particular attention to the style of play, noting if there is fighting, violence or intense competition.
Step 3
Create feeling vocabulary. After the child is sufficiently calmed by the previous exercises, use the feeling chart to help the child put words with his emotions.
Using the graph, ask the child to point to the expression he related to at the beginning of art or play time.
Ask him to point to the way he feels now. Engaging a child in a discussion about how words and feelings match helps to educate them emotionally and socially.
Tips and Warnings
- Once a feeling chart has been bought or created, leave it in an easily accessible place. Encouraging a child to use it when she begins to get angry or upset can help ward off tantrums and fighting.
- If a child has ongoing anger issues that often lead to physical violence or verbal abuse of peers and sibilings, a psychiatric consultation may help.
Things You'll Need
- Large pieces of white paper
- Crayons of all different colors
- Dolls of different shapes and sizes
- Soft balls or sports-related toys
- A feeling-facial expression chart, bought commercially or created yourself
References
- "Mood Swings: Show 'Em How You're Feeling!"; Jim Borgman; 2001
- "Art Therapy Sourcebook"; Cathy Malchiodi; 2006
- "Play Therapy with Children in Crisis, Second Edition: Individual, Group, and Family Treatment"; Nancy Boyd Webb; 1999
