The Anxiety Disorders Association of America estimates that anxiety affects 1 in every 8 children. While most children experience temporary fear that subsides over time, children with extreme anxiety worry about events and situations in advance, allowing that anxiety to paralyze their actions and affect their standards of living. If your child suffers from extreme anxiety, remember that he's not anxious on purpose and you need to manage your own expectations. In some cases, professional treatment is necessary to help your child learn to cope with his anxiety.
Step 1
Talk to your child to identify the triggers which most often cause his anxiety to surface. For some, separation from parents -- separation anxiety -- is a factor. Other children harbor anxiety over performance in school or sports. Worry over a parent or loved one's safety is another common source of anxiety for children. By understanding exactly what worries your child, you'll know how better to address his concerns to make him feel more secure.
Step 2
Validate your child's feelings. Even if you think your child's anxieties are rooted in an unrealistic situation, brushing off her fears makes her feel alone and isolated. Instead, talk about how some of her fears could affect her and acknowledge their realness to both of you.
Step 3
Plan around your child's anxieties to help him feel more secure. Change your behavior so as not to disturb his triggers. If his separation anxiety upsets him, arrange to drop him off and pick him up from school at the exact same time every day. If performance anxiety makes him nervous before a test or presentation, practice with him at home to bolster his confidence. If he worries about safety, put safeguards in place, such as a cell phone, so he can reach you at any time.
Step 4
Stay calm when managing your child's anxiety and never punish her for feeling worried or stressed. Anxiety is often uncontrollable and discipline for her condition sends a confusing message, causing even further anxiety. Know your child's limits and manage your expectations so you aren't frustrated when she refuses to try something new or exhibits fear in a certain scenario.
Step 5
Seek professional help if management tactics and daily plans don't seem to help your child's anxiety. If your child's anxiety is interrupting his daily life, affects his quality of life, is long-lasting and unimproved over time, a child psychologist is necessary to help him work through his anxiety and discover coping techniques.
References
- Anxiety Disorder Association of America: Children and Teens
- Anxiety Disorder Association of America: Tips for Parents and Caregivers
- American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry; The Anxious Child; November 2004
- National Association of School Psychologists; Anxiety and Anxiety Disorders In Children: Information for Parents; Thomas J. Huberty
