Expectant mothers receive most of the attention and advice, but first-time dads often face uncertainties and fears about becoming parents, too. Dads sometimes feel less connected during the pregnancy since they don't fully understand what their partners go through. Finding ways to take an active role in your partner's pregnancy and dealing with your own emotions helps prepare you for the changes to come when the baby is born.
Deal With Your Fears
Potential fears for an expectant father include financial security, safety and health of the mother and baby, medical procedures, caring for a newborn and being replaced or feeling that your partner will love the baby more than you. While some concerns have a legitimate base, they are often blown out of proportion and cause unnecessary stress. If you find yourself feeling stressed or upset, figure out exactly what is worrying you. Discuss your fears with your partner and work through the issues together. For example, if finances concern you, sit down with your financial information and create a budget for after the baby arrives.
Support Your Partner
While you have your fears, your partner is likely dealing with her own worries about the pregnancy, childbirth and raising a newborn. She also faces the responsibility of making healthy choices that could affect the baby's development. Encourage her to share her feelings about the pregnancy and entering parenthood. Support her in her decisions. Spend lots of quality time together in your last few months before the baby is born. As the pregnancy progresses, your partner is likely to slow down and have difficulty completing everyday tasks. Relieve some of her workload around the house so she is able to get the rest she needs.
Take a Class
Parenting and pregnancy books offer valuable information, but a hands-on prenatal class is often more interesting and effective. Sign up for a couples class with your partner to gain a better understanding of the birth process. This may help alleviate some of your fears about the medical aspect. Many hospitals offer classes for expectant fathers, usually taught by new dads. The class gives you practical advice and a glimpse at parenthood from the perspective of another man who was recently in your position.
Connect With Other Dads
If none of your friends are dads, branch out to meet other new or expectant fathers. If you do have friends who are dads, spend more time with those men in your life --- creating an informal support group for yourself during the pregnancy and once your baby is born. In some cases, the friendships allow you to interact with other babies before yours is born to gain a sense of how to take care of a newborn.
