Organized sports provide children with an opportunity to stay healthy, learn or improve skills and make new friends. Sometimes, however, being part of a sports team is not all your child expected it to be, and he quits. There are many reasons a child would make this decision. Speak to your child as well as observe the behavior of teammates and coaches to determine your child's reason for quitting.
Ability
Some children don't like to do anything at which they cannot excel, including sports. Those who play in recreational sports leagues are often taught that having fun is the most important part of the game, but winning is still in the kids' minds. Coaches and parents might be the source of planting the seed that the young athlete must be a star, or the individual child's own expectations of his abilities could be the driving force. Indiana Youth Soccer Director of Education Vince Ganzberg explains that parents and coaches should try to avoid discussing the negatives in a child's performance and instead focus on the positives so that the child will decide to continue in the program rather than quit.
Coaching
Less-than-ideal coaching can also prompt a child to decide he wants to quit a sport. Children notice when coaches are focused on winning rather than teaching skills and having fun. They also see when coaches favor some kids over others and give more negative feedback than praise. This type of coaching behavior puts a damper on the activity for some kids. A very small percentage of child athletes play college sports, according to U.S. Youth Soccer. Kids, regardless of whether they will make it to college competition, want to have fun as they work on skills. David Jennings, of the Washington state-based Vashon-Maury Island Beachcomber, explains that even coaches who demand a vigorous workout can make the sport enjoyable for their team.
Changing Interests
One of the reasons why some children quit sports is simply because they have found another activity they enjoy more. Kids have limited time after school for extracurriculars. As they rise among the ranks of the older students in their school, children often find that academic activities, drama clubs and music lessons are more to their liking. Sports and other activities can become expensive and time consuming, sometimes requiring a student to prioritize how she will spend her time. This is a perfectly normal trend in behavior, suggests Ganzberg, and is a child-led behavior rather than one controlled by the parents or coaches.
Considerations
Curtail the "just because" reason for quitting sports by talking to your child about expectations before a sports season begins. If you expect your child to finish out a season no matter what, let him know upfront before it's time to sign up. Discussing any problems with the coaches, such as lack of playing time or perceived struggles in terms of ability, is another possible approach to preventing your child from quitting. Alternatives include taking a season off and seeing the sport through fresh eyes the next year.
References
- Mississippi State University; Family, Youth and Consumer News: What to Do When Kids Quit Sports; Bonnie Coblentz; May 2001
- U.S. Youth Soccer; Why They Stop; Vince Ganzberg; August 2008
- "Vashon-Maury Island Beachcomber"; To Quit, or Not to Quit? When Kids Stop Playing Sports, Sometimes It's Adults Who Are to Blame; David Jennings; December 2008
