Positive punishment is the practice of adding a punishment and can be contrasted to negative punishment, which is the process of taking away something pleasant. Timeouts, extra chores and spanking are all examples of positive punishment. However, the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that parents never spank their children. Spanking has negative psychological consequences and may increase bad behavior. Other forms of positive punishment, however, can be effective components of a parent's disciplinary repertoire.
Positive Punishment Goals
Positive punishment should never be used as the primary discipline strategy. When children are frequently punished and infrequently rewarded, their behavior may worsen. This, in turn, increases the frequency of punishment. Instead, positive punishment should be used as the method of last resort. Parents must have something to back up their rules, and this is the role of positive punishment. Children whose parents use positive punishment infrequently know that good behavior is simply a better choice because bad behavior will result in a time out, extra chores or even a fine paid to the parents.
Punishment and Choices
Children tend to thrive in an environment in which they exert some control. This does not mean that parents shouldn't have rules. Instead, children are more likely to behave when they feel as if good behavior is a choice they make. One way to encourage this choice is to offer rewards for good behavior and punishments for bad behavior. This makes the choice to behave well seem like an obvious, easy choice. Moreover, an environment in which children are rewarded for doing the right thing or eliminating bad habits is a loving, nurturing one in which they feel as if their good behavior is noticed and appreciated.
Positive Punishment Ideas
Timeout is the most common form of positive punishment and is especially effective when children need a few minutes to calm themselves. A timeout, however, is typically not effective with longer-term bad behavior such as lying, drinking or acting out at school. Parents should have a repertoire of effective punishments available that are tailored to the child's misdeed. Extra chores and alone time are frequently effective with younger children. Parents of older children should consider charging their children small "fines" or asking them to do extra chores for a week.
Positive Punishment Warnings
Many parents use positive punishments incorrectly. For example, some parents force their children to read quietly or do word problems as a punishment. These punishments may encourage children to behave better, but they create another problem. Anything that is treated as a punishment will become something that, in the child's mind, is a bad thing. Thus parents should never treat school activities, reading or helping others as punishments. Doing so will make children less inclined to do these things.
References
- "Child Psychology"; Robin Harwood, et al.; 2008
- American Academy of Pediatrics Committee on Psychosocial Aspects of Child and Family Health: Guidance for Effective Discipline
- "The Discipline Book"; William Sears, et al.; 1995
