Selfishness can be a significant impediment for children as they learn how to effectively interact with parents, siblings and classmates. Selfishness is not a reflection of bad parenting, but parents can help transition their children out of a selfish phase. Finding strategies to combat selfishness is essential so children develop into healthy, approachable and expressive adults.
Causes
No one thing causes selfishness. An only child who does not have any interaction with children his age might struggle to share with his classmates when he enters preschool. A child who feels like his parents overlook him because of younger siblings might develop selfish habits. A negative family situation can result in a child becoming selfish, wanting mom or dad's attention all to himself. Every situation is different.
Combating Selfishness
Parents can nip selfishness in the bud when encouraging interaction with other children at a young age. Your child might not remember his first play date with another infant but he will start to learn how to interact with peers, communicate effectively and share toys. At the first sign of selfish behavior, parents can educate their children. Simply note the negative behavior and talk with your child about ways to behave more appropriately.
Correcting Selfishness
Parents might not always sense when their children's selfish behavior has started. For example, the birth of a younger sibling can turn an otherwise happy child into a jealous and selfish one. In these cases, parents have to deal with the selfishness after the fact. Parents can set examples and perform acts of selflessness. Encourage children to give back, whether they volunteer in the community or donate some of their allowance to a charity in need. Parents must always point out selfish behavior and not let children get away with it.
Impact of Selfishness
A selfish child can turn into a selfish adult. Selfishness, then, can have a lifelong impact. Selfish children might have trouble making --- or keeping --- friends, and might get into trouble at school for their behavior. If they carry this behavior into adulthood, they will continue to struggle to maintain healthy relationships. A marriage, for example, cannot be successful with a selfish partner.
