Discipline for a toddler is not the same as it is for a 6-year-old. Because children from different age groups understand rules differently, parents need to use more simplistic methods for a younger child than they do for an older one. While a time-out works for a younger child, the law of natural consequences works better for a child who can make the connection between deed and consequence more easily.
What Discipline Is
Children respond to reasonable disciplinary limits. A younger child who has not yet learned that electrical outlets are dangerous can be redirected away from outlets with a different activity. An older child can be given a time limit to visit a friend's house or for the completion of assigned tasks. An older child, preteen or teen can be guided by using logical or natural consequences.
12 Months to 2 Years
A child between the ages of 12 and 24 months can be impulsive as she learns about her world. She does not have a long attention span and expects her wishes to be met immediately. The parents of this child may be more successful if they make a game out of what they want their child to do. An example could be playing "train" with the box of toys and getting the child to play along and put the toys away before bedtime. The parents of a child who's in this age range have to discipline her right away, or she won't know why she's being disciplined.
2 to 4 Years
A child between the ages of 2 to 4 becomes more willing to adapt to parental decisions. He may develop his own rituals, so parents can incorporate these into their disciplinary practices. Giving choices to the child in this age range does not work, because he cannot decide what he wants. After the third birthday, transitions may become difficult for the child. Any necessary changes should be as simple as possible.
This child is recognizing his autonomy and begins to test his limits. As with a younger child, disciplinary consequences must be immediate so he understands the the link between deed and consequence. The child in this age range loves the word "no." He begins to realize he can't do some things he wants to do, and he becomes frustrated. Redirection works best in moving him from one activity to another, writes the Arizona Midday website.
5 to 6 Years
The 5-year-old child should be comfortable trying new activities. She wants to please her parents, but she cannot always admit to wrongdoing. This child's parents can use this desire to guide her. Misbehavior at this age is the result of her continuing immaturity.
As the 5-year-old transitions to kindergarten, she learns to obey her teacher's rules. She is most successful when her parents tell her what they expect from her. She models her behavior after her parents and other positive role models. She is at a good age to learn to replace negative behaviors with more positive behaviors. She is also old enough to begin learning how to treat others with empathy.
6 to 8 Years
A child between the ages of 6 to 8 can be rewarded for completing household chores. He is old enough to receive a small weekly allowance, which fits in with his wishes to have more possessions. Between the ages of 6 and 8, this child's relationship with his parents is more important than being punished for wrongdoing. His parents can help him focus on developing the skills he needs as he grows older. His parents can make their expectations clear by removing a favorite privilege for a set time frame.
9 to 12 Years
A child who's between the ages of 9 to 12 is beginning to separate from her parents and identify more with her friends. She does not want to be seen or treated as a younger child. The parents of this child can reserve direct commands for safety issues. As they discipline this child, the parents can communicate their values as she reaches puberty and adolescence. This child can help someone out as a form of discipline when she breaks a family rule. As she helps others out, she begins learning that her parents expect her to understand and practice positive values.
