Teen defiance is characterized by anger, disobedience and general disrespect. While at times all teenagers can be insubordinate to their parents, when this unruly nature becomes a day-to-day problem, you need to intervene. Insubordination can be caused by a variety of factors and, by understanding what is going on with your teen, you are better equipped to teach more positive responses to unpleasant situations.
Reasons
Some teens simply have more of a problem with rules and disciplinary tactics than others, while, in more extreme cases, there may be larger issues that need to be resolved. The practice of inconsistent parenting styles, such as making rules and constantly allowing them to be broken, is a risk factor for the development of defiance in teenagers. The presence of drugs and alcohol in an adolescent’s life commonly intensifies insubordination. Underlying issues that cause frustration or sadness in your teen, such as feeling rejected or pressured by peers, struggling with school or a negative body image also facilitate increased arguing and unruly behavior.
Effects
When teens are insubordinate to their parents, it affects not only life at home but other social situations, as well. If your teen is chronically argumentative, she probably is showing some of the same behaviors at school and with other authority figures. At school, defiance and disrespect lead to expulsion, increasingly bad grades and association with deviant peers. Also, insubordination directed at law enforcement can cause legal problems, which follow your teen for years.
Solutions
Teenagers who are allowed to be defiant without punishment continue in the behavior, because of the belief that they can get away with it without reprimand. For this reason, parents must never be ambivalent about disrespectful, argumentative or unruly teens. If you reprimand your adolescent after the first case of insubordinate behavior, it is less likely that it will continue. Talking to your teenager about what is on his mind and the reasoning behind his negative behavior should decrease future incidents, as well. In more severe cases, there are the options of therapy or therapeutic programs.
Mental Health
When a teen’s insubordination is severe, it is possible that a mental health issue is involved. Oppositional defiant disorder, which is a pattern of disobedient, hostile and defiant behavior toward authority figures, is a severe form of insubordination. The frustration that is associated with adolescents who suffer from learning disabilities and attention deficit hyperactivity disorder also contributes to insubordinate behavior toward parents, especially when the issues are untreated or unnoticed. Teenagers who live with anxiety, depression or bi-polar disorder also lash out at parents and other authority figures.
