The teen years can be notoriously difficult for teenagers, especially if other kids gossip about and criticize your child. Adolescent bullying can leave lasting scars, making it essential that parents, teachers and other adults in a teenager's life teach her effective coping skills. The sooner that a child learns to distinguish constructive criticism from its destructive counterpart, the better equipped she is to advocate for herself. The Center for Effective Parenting at the University of Arkansas emphasizes the importance of teaching and modeling appropriate reactions to adversity.
Step 1
Discuss the different kinds of criticism with your teenager and explain to him that constructive criticism is given with the goal of building him up, not tearing him down. It comes from a desire to see him do his best. If he is sensitive to any kind of criticism and has trouble differentiating, role play can help him see the nuances and develop appropriate responses.
Step 2
Emphasize frequently that although you should always try your best, nobody is perfect and the ability to laugh at yourself helps you survive. Allow your teen to see how you handle your own imperfections with humor and grace.
Step 3
Support your teen's interests and hobbies outside of school by finding ways for him to express those interests in a supportive environment with like-minded peers. This is particularly needed if other kids make fun of him for being artistic or intellectual. Praise him often for the skills and interests that make him unique.
Step 4
Work with your teen to develop and role play strategies for standing her ground and emerging from stressful situations looking like the bigger person. If she hears that others are gossiping about her behind her back, play the role of the gossipers and let her practice confronting you.
Tips and Warnings
- Enlist the help of a therapist if necessary. Early professional intervention can help prevent further erosion of self-esteem.
