Positive conflict resolution occurs when a child can interpret his emotions, express emotions without losing control and interpret others' emotions. To ensure parents always know what is going on with their kids, conflict resolution involving children or adolescents always should include parents. Whether the problem is at home, at school, during extracurricular activities or with the law, parents can help the child focus on problem solving as opposed to anger.
Comfort
The presence of parents or other primary caregivers brings an element of trust and comfort to conflict resolution. This is especially the case with children struggling with developmental disorders. Some issues that can complicate conflict resolution are the presence of learning disabilities, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, autism, Down syndrome and depression. Children with these types of problems can benefit from parental involvement in conflict resolution, as they are more apt to feel frustrated, confused and overly temperamental.
Familiarity
Parents may be familiar with aspects or qualities of their children that teachers or other authority figures are not -- this perspective can be helpful when conflicts occur outside the home. For example, children being bullied may confide in their parents before they do so with others. If a child is going through difficult situations at home -- like his parents' divorce, death of a loved one or depression -- he may be more prone to conflict. Parents may be more apt to know about these cases and could aid the resolution process.
Fairness
Children involved in a conflict may not believe that teachers or other adults will be completely fair when resolving it. Parental presence in a conflict's aftermath can bring balance to the situation's fairness and may decrease the possibility that others in authority positions will be able to take sides. Some basic guidelines to look for when ensuring your child is involved in a fair resolution of conflict are that each child tells his version of what happened, each child explains how he sees the problem, the children are given alternative ways to react to conflict and those involved agree on the solution.
Prevention
By involving parents in conflict resolution, there will be more of a chance that they will reprimand the child and help to prevent future occurrences. Further, parents and children who learn the proper skills for conflict resolution can use the techniques in future situations. In a mediating atmosphere, such as in a school-based setting, parents can discover what to expect from their kids during conflicts at home. By enforcing the application of conflict-resolution skills, parents teach their children how to react to disagreements in all areas of their lives.
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