Having your child become a victim of a sexual predator is many parents' worst nightmare, but is something that happens far too often. In fact, 20 percent of little girls and 10 percent of little boys are victims of a sexual abuser, according to the Child Molestation Research and Prevention Institute. Fortunately, parents can play a key role in preventing this by having an ongoing dialogue about sexual predators with their children. These conversations should be started early, when the child is still a toddler.
Step 1
Look for teachable moments. If you look for it, you will discover every day has naturally occurring incidents that you can use to initiate conversations about sexual abuse or sexual predators. While you don't need to seize every moment or overdo it, using these opportunities can be a powerful way to have a consistent, ongoing dialogue with your toddler about the subject.
Step 2
Make it clear that your toddler has ownership of her body and no one has the right to touch her if it makes her uncomfortable. It is important not just to say this, but also to practice what you preach. If your toddler does not want to kiss Aunt Sally, she should have the right to refuse without you getting upset or trying to force her to do so.
Step 3
Keep all conversations about sexual predators age-appropriate. As your toddler gets older, you will be able to go into more detail, but for now keep it simple and use language that you know he will understand.
Step 4
Explain to your child that there are bad people in the world, which is why he shouldn't talk to strangers and needs to tell you immediately if anyone makes him feel uncomfortable.
Step 5
Talk about the differences between good touching and bad touching. Teach your toddler the appropriate terminology for the genitals and explain that these are private areas that no one should be allowed to touch except in certain situations like when a parent is helping to clean the area or during a doctor appointment. Stress to your toddler that she should tell if you anyone ever tries to touch this area.
Step 6
Listen to your child. If he mentions that he just doesn't like Mr. Smith down the street, talk to him about why he feels that way. Even if you don't agree with him, make sure you are not condescending or judgmental as even toddlers can pick up on these tones in your voice. Instead, respect your toddler's thoughts and feelings, whatever they may be. Your toddler should feel comfortable talking to you about anything, so if a sexual abuse situation does arise, he will be more likely to tell you about it.
Tips and Warnings
- There are numerous children's books available about preventing sexual abuse, and these books can also be a helpful way to initiate a conversation with your toddler about this topic. Many children mistakenly conclude only strangers will be the ones to try to hurt them or touch them inappropriately. Therefore, make it clear that she should tell you if anyone engages in bad touching, even if the person is a family member, friend, teacher or trusted adult.
- Although it is important to talk to children about the dangers of sexual predators, talking is not a substitute for consistent, vigilant adult supervision. As important as it is to educate your child, it is equally important to educate yourself about what else you should be doing to protect your child from sexual abuse.
