Whether children are personally abused or are witnesses to domestic violence, they are affected, according to Stop Family Violence, a nonprofit resource for families. Children exposed to domestic violence experience side effects comparable to those who were abused. The effects of domestic violence on kids range from emotional problems, such as depression, to physical effects ranging from obesity and heart disease to drug abuse. There are steps you can take to counter the effects of domestic violence on kids.
Step 1
Sign necessary permission slips for your child to be seen by professionals at school. In a report by the American Bar Association, attorneys found that trained professionals, often school counselors, can provide the level of counseling that children need after being exposed to domestic violence.
Step 2
Follow up on any referrals made by police or the courts to get counseling services for the kids. Early intervention is one of the best ways to counteract the effects of domestic abuse on a child. Various types of counseling for children can include play therapy, peer support groups, anger management classes and safety programs to teach kids how to extract themselves from dangerous situations.
Step 3
Find a loving and supportive adult to introduce to the child. Whether it is a family member, counselor or community advocate, researchers at the Family Violence Defense Fund report that the single most important ingredient necessary to help children heal and develop resiliency is the presence of a consistent, loving adult. Allow and encourage the child to spend regular times with the adult.
Step 4
Provide a safe environment that does not include violence in any form. Find ways to discipline that do not involve hitting. Refrain from name-calling and yelling, threatening and any form of verbally aggressive behavior.
Step 5
Help the child develop routines to create a sense of safety. Regular wake-up times, meals and homework can help to demonstrate structure that may not have been available in the previous violent environment. Stick to routines the child can come to count on and keep promises made to the child.
Tips and Warnings
- Children coming from physically abusive homes may be hesitant to touch or be hugged. Allow them the space they need until they are ready to get closer physically once they feel safe and secure.
- Don't make a child keep secrets. He should be allowed to talk to healthcare providers, social workers, counselors and police when and if he wants to. Keeping secrets only exacerbates the negative effects that the violence has on the child.
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