1. Ask Someone Close
Wanting a baby and not being able to have one creates intense sadness. Thus, some couples chose to have a baby through a surrogate mother. There are many reasons preventing a woman from conceiving a baby and several options for choosing a surrogate. Someone the couple knows may be a good candidate. A sister, cousin, friend or other family member is a good place to start. It takes a lot of love to have a baby for someone else, and by choosing someone close to you, she can also relinquish the baby to you but remain a part of the child's life. This type of surrogacy is usually an altruistic surrogacy, since it is more than likely done more for love than money. However, it is still important to make sure you are all clear on the particulars from the beginning. Sit down and discuss all aspects of the conception, pregnancy and turning the child over before you finalize your decision.
2. Womb for Rent
There are agencies that will match a surrogate to a family. This is a good way for the couple to know the surrogate mother they choose passes rigorous medical screening and will be more likely to have a healthy baby. It takes a great sacrifice to carry someone else's child for nine months, and it usually doesn't come cheap. A couple may be asked to cover all the surrogate's medical expenses, living expenses and other compensation before, during and after the pregnancy. The agencies also take care of the legal aspects and contracts for the surrogacy. Talk to several candidates before making your decision, and don't be afraid to say no if she doesn't feel like a good fit.
3. Advertise for Surrogacy
Place advertisements in newspapers, appropriate magazines and online to help you find a surrogate mother for your baby. Interview your candidate over the phone and be sure to have a list of questions to ask her. If you like her, set up a face-to-face interview. You may also ask a trusted friend or family member to accompany you to the meeting. It's important for each of you to feel comfortable. During the meeting, get down to business right away so each of you know what the other expects.
4. Ask Around
Ask your doctor or local midwife if they know of anyone who would consider being a surrogate mom for you. Many times a woman who has had a surrogate pregnancy for one couple may consider doing it again. You may also consider asking members of a mom's group or your church congregation if they know of anyone who will help you bring a baby into your lives.
