Talking to your children about sex is never an easy task. If the time has come for you to talk to your daughter about sex, it's important that you are as prepared as possible for the conversation, and understand that it won't be easy, regardless of how old your daughter is. Knowing how to approach the topic and what to say, however, can make the talk a lot easier for both parent and child.
Step 1
Take it one step at the time. If you try to approach too many sex topics at once, it will not only be overwhelming, but also confusing. Chances are both you and your daughter will feel embarrassed, so talking for a short period of time might be better. Just make sure you find a quiet space where you can get some privacy and not be interrupted. Sometimes it's better to go to a different environment to talk. Instead of doing it at home, go for a drive or sit on a bench at the park.
Step 2
Let her ask questions. You can start the conversation by asking if there's something specific she wants to talk about or you can do the talking and let her tell you her concerns later. Be prepared to answer anything that comes up. It's always better that your daughter gets an answer from you, rather than being misinformed by hearing things from other kids.
Step 3
Explain the anatomy correctly. Use the right terms, rather than cutesy or childish alternatives, and have a book with diagrams on hand if you're going to explain things like reproduction or how a period works. If you don't know exactly how a process works, study in advance so you can answer questions properly.
Step 4
Be clear and direct. Talk about the consequences of sexual activity, including diseases and the possibility of pregnancy. Then explain what can be done to prevent these problems.
Step 5
Talk about the emotional impact of sex. This is a good time to talk about peer pressure and the importance of waiting until she feels ready, rather than having sex because "everybody else is doing it." Your daughter should understand that sex is a normal part of life, but that it is better enjoyed when the decision of having it is made responsibly.
Tips and Warnings
- Always offer alternative sources of information. Children often feel embarrassed to talk to their parents about sex, even when they have questions. Buying a comprehensive book that covers the most questions is a good way to provide reliable information while giving your daughter some privacy.
