Parents often find it more difficult to communicate effectively with their children as they grow and develop their independent thoughts and ideas. Distractions also get in the way of good parent and child verbal interaction. Regardless of the difficulties, it is important to establish good and consistent communication with young ones who are becoming more independent and encountering more difficult life situations. There are several techniques parents can use to get their points across and to help children open up to them.
Step 1
Initiate conversations by physically getting down on your child's level. Have a seat rather than towering over your child with your greater height. If necessary, get down on the floor with your child seated so you can be eye to eye. This will help eliminate any intimidation your child feels.
Step 2
Assure your child you will accept and love him no matter what. Encourage him to be honest with you, even if the things he needs to tell you are not pleasant. Let him know that every problem can be worked through and that you are willing to help him with anything.
Step 3
Speak in an even and polite tone when you address a child. Keep your voice calm, and ask your child what happened instead of demanding information. If you stay composed, there is a greater chance the child will as well and that you will get the information you need.
Step 4
Become an active listener. Concentrate on hearing and absorbing all your child has to say. Resist the temptation to react to certain words or information, and let your child finish before you jump in.
Step 5
Take a moment to absorb what you hear from your child before responding. Think about what you want to say and use motivating positive language when you do talk to the child. Be ready for a give-and-take conversation in which you listen, think and respond.
Step 6
Praise your child's willingness to communicate. Let her know how proud you are of him for all attempts at communicating. This positive response will help him to be open with you in the future.
Tips and Warnings
- Turn off the television and ignore the telephone when you are having a conversation with your child. Let him know he is more important than these distractions. If the child is reluctant to speak directly with you, suggest that he write a letter to you. You can discuss the information in the note at a later time.
- Don't interrupt a child who is talking to you, even if it is to try to help him when he is struggling to say something. Give him time to get the words out. Postpone talking to your child when you are angry or upset. Cool down first so you do not raise your voice or say things you will later regret.
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