There are no solid rules for learning how to tell if someone is lying to you. Unfortunately, habitual liars are usually very good at pulling the wool over the eyes of others. However, people who have worked in law enforcement for extended periods of time have figured out a few ways to tell if a person is likely to be telling the truth or a lie. You too can learn how to use these techniques to figure out if someone is being straightforward with you or if he is simply telling you a tall tale.
Step 1
Study the person's face for microexpressions. Microexpressions are brief displays of deep-rooted feelings that flash across someone's face when she is pretending to be calm and collected. For example, a person who is angry might display a microexpression of exasperation in the form of a miniscule facial movement like an eyebrow twitch, states lying expert and former FBI agent Joe Navarro. However, Navarro states that while these expressions are extremely accurate, they are generally fleeting. Therefore, if you rely on this technique, be patient and keep your eyes on the person's face for as long as you can during the conversation.
Step 2
Make the person feel comfortable, and then be on the lookout for unusual behavior. You want to uncover discomfort, not deception, according to Navarro. Watch for signs of insecurity, such as shoulder shrugs and folded arms. Look for any other behaviors that are out-of-the-ordinary also, such as nervous tics or excessive sweating.
Step 3
Listen for phrases such as "I swear on my mother's grave," "honestly" and "I swear to God," states Mark McClish, a retired deputy U.S. Marshal. These phrases are usually stated by people who are trying to convince you they are telling the truth when they are not. Another phrase McClish says to look out for is "I am trying to be honest," a statement that really means "I am not being honest."
Step 4
Determine if someone is lying to you by the tense that he uses within a sentence. A person who honestly describes an event that happened in the past will use the past tense, according to McClish. For example, he would say "I saw her 2 weeks ago, and she told me that she already took care of it." If he is lying, he will slip up and use the present tense and say something like, "I saw her 2 weeks ago, and she tells me that she already took care of it."
Tips and Warnings
- Ask a trusted family member or friend to accompany you during the conversation with the suspected liar.
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