For a wide variety of reasons, children develop mental, behavioral and emotional problems that can be extraordinarily disruptive and destructive to the child, family and community. Children may argue, fight and sulk. They may habitually violate rules at home or school, refuse to do chores or homework, get involved in alcohol, drug or substance use, habitually lie,or steal or become physically aggressive. These are all serious problems that have potentially devastating short- and long-term effects. On rare occasions children outgrow their problems. More than likely, problems persist, extracting costs in terms of well-being, learning, performance in school and long-term emotional adjustment of the child and his family. These issues should not be ignored or dismissed. With help, you and your child can begin the process of addressing the many possible underlying problems that contribute to and maintain your child's emotional and behavioral distress.
Step 1
Identify the specific problems and issues that are disrupting your child's life and your family life. View your child's problematic behavior and mood as alarms alerting you to underlying issues that need to be addressed. Websites such as MentalHealth.SAMHSA.gov and NLM.NIH.gov provide resources that will help you identify different types of problem behaviors, moods and thoughts that are symptoms of serious but treatable disorders. The website found at MassGeneral.org provides online preliminary mental health screening tools that you can complete to get a better view of issues that you can review and discuss with your child's doctor or counselor.
Step 2
Make an appointment to have your child seen by his primary care physician. A variety of medical problems such as allergy, endocrinological, metabolic, neurological or nutritional problems can contribute to emotional and behavioral disturbances. Possible underlying illnesses and medical problems should be evaluated and ruled out. Get recommendations for specific practitioners and a referral for a mental health evaluation by a psychologist.
Step 3
Implement a behavior management program at home. Discuss the behavior and mood problems you feel are taking place directly with your child. Involve your child in the process of making things better. Identify and agree upon specific behavior problems that need to be amended. Examples may include showing respect toward others, using proper language, meeting curfews, doing homework, and so forth. Establish house rules of conduct that apply to all members of the household, including adults. Discuss and agree upon positive and negative consequences for compliance or failure to comply with rules of conduct. Be generous with positive reinforcement and recognition of positive behavior and attitudes. Work on relationship building, as a strong bond is essential to working through your child's anger and resentment. Then, monitor and follow through consistently with the behavior program.
Step 4
See a professional therapist. Call your insurance company to get names of psychologists or counselors that will be covered by your insurance. Make sure you get names of providers who work with children. Your child should obtain a full evaluation, and you should also consider getting involved in either family or parent-training therapy as well. These therapies empower parents as co-therapists, extending treatment beyond an hour-a-week therapy sessions into the day-to-day life of the family.
Step 5
Set up a medication evaluation with your child's doctor or with a pediatric psychiatrist if problems persist.
