During the toddler years, the opportunities for learning and independence seem endless. Parents may beam with pride, seeing how their child is adjusting to the world, until the hitting, biting and generally aggressive behavior begins. Aggression in toddlers is a normal part of development and is caused in part because young children do not always have the verbal skills to be able to express themselves. Parents can control the aggressive behavior of their toddlers with firmness and by limiting their child's outside exposure to aggression.
Step 1
Stay calm when dealing with your toddler's aggressive behavior. Children learn from what they see. Being a role model while dealing with an undesirable situation can help teach your child that hitting, biting or other aggressive behavior is not an appropriate way to act when they are frustrated or tired.
Step 2
Speak to your toddler firmly and clearly with language that he understands regarding his aggression. Simple statements such as, "We don't kick in our house," lets your child know that his behavior is not acceptable. WhattoExpect.com suggests redirecting your toddler's attention to another activity to distract him.
Step 3
Discipline your toddler when needed, with a time-out, to let her know that aggressive behavior is not OK. Between the ages of 1 and 3, a child's time-out should only be a couple of minutes long, but it involves removing her from the situation in which the aggression reared its head. Isolate your child from other children and her toys, and explain that she is having a time-out because she was hitting, biting or yelling.
Step 4
Keep your toddler's daily routine consistent. WhattoExpect.com explains that sometimes a small child will become aggressive when he is tired, hungry or otherwise out of his routine. Have prepackaged snacks ready in a diaper bag or in the car to head off hunger if you recognize this to be one of the precursors to your child's aggression.
Step 5
Limit your child's exposure to television or games that may be violent in nature, as this may promote aggressive behavior. Parents who have toddlers as well as older children may need to be vigilant about keeping the older child's video games or DVDs out of his younger sibling's hands.
Step 6
Learn to identify your toddler's expressions of anger and head off aggressive behavior through conversation. Dr. Sarah Landy, a child psychiatrist, suggests reflecting your toddler's emotional state in a way that shows him that negative feelings are OK to have without acting on them. Saying, "You look angry. Can you tell me why?" opens up a dialogue that could prevent aggressive acts.
Step 7
Create a reward chart that helps your toddler earn stickers or small toys for good behavior. Children in this age group need positive reinforcement as well as reprimanding to correct aggressive behavior. Your child may be excited enough about the promised rewards to stop hitting or displaying other forms of undesired behavior.
Step 8
Speak to your child's pediatrician if aggressive behavior becomes prolonged and your attempts to stop it do not work. According to Caremark Health Resources, a toddler's aggression could be the result of developmental delays, emotional trauma or other problems within the household that are not an "easy fix." Your child's pediatrician may be able to refer you to a specialist who can help your toddler.
Things You'll Need
- Snacks
- Reward chart
