The first signs of memory impairment--getting lost, burning dinner or forgetting a neighbor's name--mark the beginning of a difficult journey, both for the sufferer as well as the caregivers. All caregivers are faced with the dilemma of how to keep the loved one safe, healthy and happy. But each situation differs according to finances, living arrangements, availability of caregivers and whether or not family members are able to cooperate to make difficult but necessary decisions.
Exploring Care Options
Most people with early-stage dementia prefer to continue living in their familiar home. This becomes a viable option if the person is married or living with another family member who can help with daily needs. Some people in the early stages of dementia can live at home safely when receiving homemaker services such as assistance to bathe, shop and prepare meals. However, it is best to plan well in advance how to provide the full-time care that will inevitably be required. Options may include an assisted living facility with a memory impairment wing or moving in with an adult child.
Changing Relationships
As the person with early-stage dementia becomes increasingly dependent upon others, adult children in a sense become the "parents" as their own parent loses the ability to communicate and becomes confused. This is a frustrating time for all involved. Caregivers can more effectively communicate with loved ones by speaking slowly with good eye contact, avoiding noisy environments and asking only one question at a time. Caregivers should also avoid using pronouns--instead name objects, people and places directly. Offer two choices such as "Do you want chocolate or vanilla?" rather than an open-ended question such as "What flavor do you want?"
Enjoying Time Together
As the person with dementia forgets about her past and loses the ability to converse, it becomes challenging to enjoy time together. However, caregivers can maintain a close relationship by replacing conversation with games and other mutually enjoyed activities such as gardening, walks or movies. People with memory impairment also enjoy helping their family members. A grandmother can rock the baby while her daughter prepares dinner or a grandfather can assist his grandson to put bottles and cans into the recycling bin.
Care for Caregivers
According to the Alzheimer's Association, the typical primary family caregiver is in her 70s and has at least two chronic health problems. Over 60 percent of them are women. Caregiving can be a full-time job that not only prevents employment but denies caregivers the regular social contact necessary for mental well-being. Attending support groups and communicating online with others who share these burdens can help the caregiver fell less alone as well as learn helpful caregiving tips.
It is essential that caregiving be shared amongst family members when possible; even a family member who lives far away can help by communicating with health care providers or offering to pay for respite care. Additionally, having the sufferer spend days at an adult daycare or senior center will give much needed respite for caregivers.
The Changing Role of Caregiver
Many people with early-stage dementia live in assisted living facilities that provide 24-hour supervision. Some family members feel guilty that they can no longer provide home care, but this changed relationship provides an opportunity to spend quality time together during visits and community outings. It can be a lot of fun to participate in games, exercise groups or parties led by the recreation staff. Building relationships with the staff helps reassure family members that they have made the right decisions.
References
- "Eldercare: A Guide to Clinical Geriatrics"; O'Hara-Devereaux; 1981
- "What If It's Not Alzheimer's?", Lisa Radin & Gary Radin, 2003.
- "The Source for Alzheimer's and Dementia"; Pam Britton Reese
