Lying is commonplace among teens and adults alike. Sometimes it's done for good reasons, such as to spare a friend's feelings or to keep a secret about a surprise. A teen might lie for a number of reasons, report doctors at MassGeneral Hospital for Children. Teens lie to avoid causing parental disfavor, about sex or how they spend their time. When teenagers engage in behavior they know will get them into trouble, they often lie to avoid consequences. Over time, lying becomes habitual and more difficult to spot, but you can watch for telltale signs.
Step 1
Listen for hesitations in his speech. Teens who are not accustomed to lying will talk more haltingly with pauses and subtle stuttering. The pitch of their voices may change and become higher or lower than normal.
Step 2
Watch for fidgeting. Teens who are lying may often fidget with their clothes or scratch their necks or faces. If they have trouble standing still while talking or are constantly tapping their feet, they may be lying. Rubbing their hands over their mouths often is a telltale sign of lying, because subconsciously they don't want to tell the lie.
Step 3
Ask your teen to repeat her story to another adult or to repeat the tale to you a short while after telling you something. A teen who is lying will have trouble keeping all the facts straight. Remember the details, and ask your teen the same question a couple of different ways to see if the story varies at all.
Step 4
Look at your teen's face when you suspect he is lying. He will either avoid your eyes completely or stare directly at you and not break eye contact. Teens often realize that if they don't look you straight in the eye, you'll suspect they are lying, so they overcompensate and try to stare you down.
Step 5
Consider the teen's personality and whether her mood is appropriate to the subject. Some teens who lie try to use humor to cover their inconsistencies. Others may become overly defensive or eager to change the subject. Watch for changes from the communication style your teen usually adopts. She will seem to be acting differently when she is not being honest.
Tips and Warnings
- Doctors at MassGeneral report that teenagers who are depressed tend not to lie. Take your teen's words seriously if he is suffering from depression.
- If your teen constantly lies even it's not necessary to hide something, he may have a personality disorder and need medical attention, report doctors at the Mayo Clinic. Compulsive lying, also called mythomania, is a mental illness that usually begins to show in early childhood.
