It seems as soon as you get used to your child doing one thing, she develops a new habit. A toddler's bedtime habits are likely disrupted by the move from a crib to a bed, whether it's a toddler bed or a twin bed. With the new freedom to roam, a toddler may not want to stay in bed. Plus, toddlers are often more interested in playing than in going to sleep. However, sleep is a critical component of a child's development, not to mention that a quiet evening with your spouse makes life much more pleasant for the whole family. Fortunately, you can get your toddler to stay in bed after a few days of work, though for some children it can take up to a week or more. The key is to be consistent in how you treat your child once she emerges after having been put to bed.
Step 1
Provide your child with a cuddly toy or blanket with which to sleep. Although he may understand that he needs to stay in bed, family therapist Dr. Gayle Peterson notes that children need to soothe themselves to do so. An object that represents the love of his family can help a child soothe himself without getting up to seek his parents.
Step 2
Consider adding a boundary. Many parents attach a side rail on the bed to help remind their child that she should stay in bed.
Step 3
Reward good behavior. Children thrive on positive reinforcement, so consider giving your child a star or sticker for each time he stays in bed for five or 10 minutes at first. Extend the time as your child gets used to the concept of being in a bed. Once he's earned three stickers, give him a reward for staying in bed.
Step 4
Don't engage in a conversation with your child when she gets out of bed. Instead, the first time your child gets up, walk her back to bed, say good night and give her a kiss. The next time, walk her back to bed and give her a kiss. The next time, walk her back to bed without comment or contact. Continue this behavior each successive time so that she doesn't get any engagement from you when she's out of bed. This minimizes her temptation to seek out her parents.
Tips and Warnings
- Be patient and consistent as each child is different. For some children, it can take a week or more to get settled in their own beds.
- Don't set a precedent of sitting with your child until she falls asleep. The habit can be very difficult to break.
