Resolving to go to marriage counseling affirms your level of commitment and establishes that you acknowledge that your marriage could be in jeopardy if you fail to get help. While the decision to go to counseling is a crucial step, it is only the prelude to an often lengthy and demanding process. If you and your spouse fully dedicate yourselves to the course of therapy, you can access the tools to improve communication, develop a deeper understanding of each other and enhance the intimacy you so greatly desire in your marriage.
Initial Relationship Evaluation
The initial counseling session can be intimidating, but being aware of what to expect can alleviate any possible anxiety of the process. The first session is likely to be a general overview, addressing the concerns and issues that have led you into marriage counseling. You should expect to take turns articulating which aspect you consider the most detrimental in your marriage, and then discussing your spouse's interpretation of the cause of problems in the marriage. The point of this verbalization is for the therapist to observe the manner of communication in which you relate to each other.
Individual Assessments
Assessing spouses on an individual level is important for the purpose of an unbiased and accurate evaluation on the therapist's part. Frequently, spouses enter counseling because they aren't able to communicate effectively, so they struggle with vocalizing certain issues in the presence of the other. Being truthful is vital for the therapist to accurately gauge the source of contention in the relationship, and suggest the proper techniques for behavioral modification and constructive communication.
Addressing the Crucial Issues
Completing the individual assessments enables the therapist to evaluate the central issues that each spouse considers the source of the marital conflict. The therapist compiles an evaluation from the joint and individual sessions and shares judgment of the situation with you in the next session, listing the findings from most important to least important. She then discusses the suitable course of action she believes would benefit both spouses to put your marriage back on track.
Improving Communication
Consecutive sessions enact the plan of therapy by encouraging communication between spouses with the therapist as a mediator. He observes the interaction and proposes various ways in which the exchanging of thoughts or feelings may be more effective. Proposing hypothetical conflicts is a method that the therapist may utilize to acquaint you with a more constructive method of interaction. Dealing with conflict in the presence of an objective observer offers you a more coherent understanding of the motivations for your marital dissonance.
Regaining the Strength of Your Marriage
Toward the end of intensive marriage counseling, the sessions are usually distributed further apart, enabling you and your spouse to execute the techniques you have learned without the presence of an intermediary. Enacting the systems of therapy and incorporating them into your marriage takes effort, but by recognizing the necessity of breaking old habits and destructive contention, you and your spouse can begin building a new pattern of communication and intimacy in your marriage.
