4 Ways to Raise a Child With Asperger's Syndrome

1. Remember Who is Boss

As the parent of a child with Asperger's syndrome, you're bound to face challenges that will try your patience. Remember that the example you set could teach your child how to react when he becomes upset. Be patient and fair, yet firm with the child. However, that doesn't always mean giving orders and expecting them to be followed to the letter. Part of your job is to facilitate proper behavior in specific situations. Often, that means using your parental savvy to wield a subtle influence on the child and encourage the desired response or behavior.

2. Don't React, Prevent

Be proactive. With the input of the child's doctor and his therapy team, educate yourself on the specific issues you'll face as you raise the child through the preschool and school-aged years into adolescence and early adulthood. Use environmental controls to establish healthy routines. For example, you might teach the child that the table is the only appropriate place to eat food so that the child doesn't make a mess of the brand-new living room carpet, or behave inappropriately when visiting others.

Employ a technique called "reframing" to reduce the strain of important transitions. In this concept, you link the new situation with new rules, and then enforce those rules frequently. Use statements that follow this form: "In elementary school, we did it X way, but you're in middle school now, and they do it Y way." The result often will be a smoother integration into the new situation.

3. Employ Positive Reinforcement

While it's crucial to institute structure into the lives of children with Asperger's syndrome, which necessarily includes punishing transgressions of rules, one tip many parents find helpful is to focus on positives. Every Asperger's child has a particular skill or is proficient in a particular subject. Encouraging development of that skill is an excellent place to start being positive.

Along the same lines, it's just as important to institute a rewards system for positive behavior as it is to use a punishment system for bad behavior. This encourages the child to default towards positive behavior in situations when a reaction either way is equally likely.

4. Reach for Help

An excellent place for you to get tips, information and resources on how to raise a child with Apserger's syndrome is through a support group for parents of affected children. As an added benefit, your child might find new playmates through the network of friends and acquaintances you establish there.